While we can all dream that there is the perfect person out there for everyone, we can also agree that each person is not perfect for everyone else. There are absolutely dealbreakers that would apply to one person and not someone else.
But most of us can agree that there are certain things that you absolutely do not say on a first date.
Redditor TacticalBabushka asked:
"What is the worst thing to say on a first date?"
No Fat-Shaming Allowed
"Once I went on a date with a guy, and afterward I messaged something like, 'So what did you think?'"
"And he answered, 'You carry your weight well.'"
"I was surprised, because it’s a subject that had never come up before at any point, and this was back before filters existed, so he knew exactly how I looked before we met, it wasn’t due to any surprises."
"He also wasn’t into 'overweight women,' per his own admission, so this wasn’t said with enthusiasm."
- HyperboleEverAfter
Sweet Ulterior Motives
"My husband actually said to me on our first date, 'I’m really glad you’re not skinny.'"
"I think he meant it as a compliment. 12 years later, I realize it’s because he assumed (correctly) I could cook."
"He likes to eat."
"I am 5’7 and at the time we met, I weighed 190ish. I’m pretty solid built, and yeah, I have some meat on me, but it’s not sloppy. I’ve always worn a size 12/14 and I’m busty."
"He weighed 260 at 5’9 and was into bodybuilding, his chest measured 52 inches (no man boobs). He also worked in a steel mill at the time and probably needed to consume 5k calories a day just to maintain. We are not small people, lol (laughing out loud)."
"And yes, I can cook very well. Good food is very important to him. We currently weigh 160 (me) and 250."
- Argercy
"He likes to eat so much he put his own foot in his mouth!"
- Constant-Sandwich-88
Too Much Too Fast
"I love you."
- Bmilvis
"So, this reminds me of something that happened to me (TL;DR: the man was already making plans for marriage and the rest of our lives not even five minutes after meeting each other):"
"A Tinder date said, 'I saw in your profile that you’re in environmental science as well as soil science. How about we take some time to negotiate where we should move in the future when we are married based on where you want to study.'"
"I chuckled at him and thought he was just being cheeky and flirty, but then he got this very confused and serious expression and said, 'Why are you laughing? You don’t see yourself marrying me?'"
"And it was after we JUST said hi to each other, bruh!"
- Astro_Baddie
The Ex Talk
"Anything about your ex that was unprompted."
- Jugnaut_
"Oh yes. I went on a first date where my date started talking about his exes for some reason. Then it continued to how he was still friends with most of them. And the finale was, 'I may not be a good boyfriend, but I'm a great ex.'"
"The appetizers weren't even served yet... I really didn't know what to do with that information. We didn't meet again (for that and other reasons)."
- double_plankton
"I met up with a girl on Tinder in the middle of quarantine and just blabbered on about my last couple of girlfriends for like an hour in her car and then left. It felt so good to talk to someone in person that wasn’t my parents."
"Then she texted me as soon I I drove off like, 'Maybe next time you meet up with someone, you should let them speak and not talk about all of your ex-girlfriends, dude.'"
"It was pretty f**king embarrassing honestly, lol (laughing out loud)."
- parkrat92
"Bro was looking for a therapy session."
- The_Next_Legend
A Way to Be Introduced
"I saw your sister when I was going through all your Facebook pics. She's hot. Is she seeing anyone?"
- I_Lick_Bananas
Inappropriate Promises
"From a girl to me: 'I am so fertile, you can get me pregnant just by looking at me.' She was in her mid 20's, with three kids, all from different fathers."
"I did not go back for a second date."
- Tallguy67ca
Weird Comparisons
"'You remind me of my mom.'"
- Icy_Alfalfa_6896
"This happened to me… I eventually met her and realized i don’t want to ever become them."
- ZealousIdeal_Face572
"Or 'you remind me of my ex.'"
- notthepapa
Acing the Test
"You have passed the preliminaries and are definitely in the running. Good job."
- Shiny_Whisper_321
Sad Trombone
"Not me, but my wife and I were having lunch near a college campus. We ordered and found a spot. There were two college kids sitting behind me. There weren't a lot of patrons so it wasn't as loud as it could be."
"With that being said, from the conversation they were having, we gathered it was a first date."
"Our food arrived and we started eating, and midway through, I looked at my wife and told her I was glad we were past all that awkwardness of figuring each other out."
"Another five minutes hadn't even passed, and I heard the guy telling his date that, 'At night I have to play really sad music because I can only go to sleep if I cry...'"
"When I tell you my wife and I stopped mid-chew and wide-eyed stared at each other... I started to turn around to save him from digging deeper, but my wife grabbed my arm and shook her head no."
"Then my wife said she (the date) had this. What she saw that I didn't, was the young man's date was in the process of grabbing her purse and leaving."
"He sat there for about five minutes after that and left. I looked at my wife and said, 'He's probably going to sleep early tonight.'"
- MastrShak3
All the Red Flags
"I’ve heard a lot of crazy and bad stuff on first dates."
"One told me her boyfriend was in jail and she will be with him when he gets out and she doesn’t want him to know that she’s dating other people. But that wasn’t the worst."
"Neither was the date that had six beers while we talked for a few hours and said it helped her anxiety (an alcoholic red flag)."
"The worst was someone that spent almost an entire hour telling me how unhappy she was with her life. I mean her family made her unhappy, her job made her unhappy, her body made her unhappy, her baggage made her unhappy and even her car made her unhappy. She was looking for someone that would sign up to help her make it all better."
"I told her good luck and thank you for the time. It was the best learning experience I had on a first date."
- palm_desert_tangelos
When No is a Complete Sentence
"In my twenties, early twenties, I walked in, sat down at the table, and the girl simply said, 'No.'"
"I got up, walked back out, and drove home. I say that sucked quite a bit, you know."
- randomdaysnow
Awkward or Fun?
"'You have the same name as my dog.'"
- BlueCanary434
"I’m laughing now, but if a guy ever told me that, I’d be confused and then would bond with his dog so hard. The stories that I could tell that would sound weird as if I were talking about myself would be amazing."
- New-Seesaw9255
Educational Matters
"'You know the earth's flat, right?'"
- WillKillz
The Second-Hand Embarrassment
"One time on a date, the girl wanted to pick me up. Weird but sure. So we saw a movie and then we grabbed coffee, and she was just driving me around."
"She mentioned work was so boring that day that she wanted to pull her hair out."
"Like an id**t, out of my mouth come the words, 'Don’t do that. Nobody likes a bald girl.'"
"She went quiet for a second and then said, 'I guess this is a good time to tell you that I have cancer and this is a wig.'"
"I still crawl inside myself with I think about that."
- KarateKid1984
We've all made mistakes in our lives and likely have said some things we didn't mean or that we wish we could have phrased better. But when we're trying to make a good first impression on a first date, there's a special sting to those mistakes that we make.