It's not a huge revelation that the people you meet online through various dating apps can be very different in person.
Corresponding with a person that strikes your fancy on apps allows time to process and generate engaging conversation to keep a potential date interested.
But when the time comes to meet them face to face, the date can inevitably go one of two ways, and it all depends on the things that are said in the absence of the luxuries of DM-ing.
Curious to hear about unfortunate dating experiences, strangers online responded to an anonymous Redditoredditor asking:
"What’s the worst thing a first date said to you that made you think red flag?"
When your date indicates they have one foot still in the past, it's time for you to move on.
Third Wheel
“How about we go carpet shopping…with my ex…who is still living with me for financial reasons.”
– throw123454321purple
Full Transparency
“ 'I am in love with my f'kbuddy and I can’t promise I won’t cheat on you with her' saw them couple of years later walking hand in hand, good for them."
– FeyreMorr
Rebel With A Cause
"Blind date. 20-something girl, shows up dressed like James Dean, with cigs rolled up in her shirt sleeve, talking like Marges chain smoking sisters."
'I'm not sure why I'm here. Once my boyfriend gets out of jail, he's going to divorce his wife and we are getting married.'
"Good luck with that, I'm out."
– aelios
Some things you're never prepared for, and there's never enough time to hide your authentic facial reactions. Cases in point...
No Margin For Error
"On a first date, they looked me dead in the eye and said, 'I’ve never really been wrong about anything.' The way they said it, so seriously, made me realize they probably wouldn’t handle disagreements well. Big red flag."
– dinonuggies2003
Gone Rogue
"The first words out of a date's mouth was that she was trying to think of a gift for one of her friends from Alcoholics Anonymous. This was at a bar."
"I looked at the pint sitting in front of her. 'Oh, I just go for the stories.' Apparently I went out with real life Marla Singer."
– Specialist_Fun9295
Moving Too Fast
“I just want to make it clear that I want to be married by the end of the year. I move fast, so if you’re not down with that then this might not work.”
"I was, in fact, not down with that."
– OldBrokeGrouch
Potter Super Fan
"When I first tried okcupid like 15 years ago the woman came up to me and looked nothing like her pictures. She had a huge coat on that had these four huge pockets on the front and she said, 'I’d hug you but my pockets are full of broken glass.' ”
"She explained that she had to clean some up before her shift at work ended and then she had to rush to meet me. Probably should’ve said something but I was young and wanted to be polite so we wound up seeing one of the Harry Potter movies together."
"It turned out she was a potter fanatic so after the movie this woman laden with sharp garbage told me all about her fanfictions. Good times."
– NightOnTheSun
Let's Go LARPing
"I met a woman out of the blue in a park while our kids were playing, we talked for awhile then as we're leaving she says I never do this but here's my number, let's keep in touch. I was incredibly flattered, it really made my day."
"We text frequently over the next few weeks and start making plans to meet up but it's difficult as her vehicle isn't road worthy to travel the highway and my schedule was really hectic at the time. Texts start getting strange then stranger."
"I told her about my job (I worked in an analytical lab at the time), and she begins filling me in on her fantasy, that I'm her sexy scientist and she wants me to build a time machine to travel to the middle ages where she is working as a bar wench."
"She was a fairly petite woman, but in her fantasy she is specific that she weighs 350lbs. And she has never taken a bath. And it was my job to give her her first bath. That was the last real conversation we had, never made it to a first date, but was followed by several months of periodic ramble texts about her feelings for me and how I was wrong to stop talking with her."
"People are weird."
– fritop3ndejo
It doesn't get any better.
Peace At A Cost
"Can you buy me some gift cards so my kids stay quiet"
– roofcutter650
Wife Seeker
"He started asking weird questions, like 'what fabric would you choose to recover a patio set?' And things like that. It turned out he was interviewing me for the role of wife. At the end of the date, he announced I checked all the requirements, and we needed to plan for me to quit my job and become his girlfriend."
"He would pay for everything (he was the CFO of a big company) and he couldn’t have a girlfriend/wife that worked. I also needed to find a cause to volunteer for. These all told with a straight face. I was speechless. I told him it was time to go and we could talk later."
"Then I message him telling him I felt no chemistry (which was true) and I didn’t think a relationship would work. He insisted and continued to message me for a while insisting I was perfect and needed to be his wife. 🤦🏻♀️"
– SexyVinci
So Here's What's Going To Happen For Us
"Once had a tinder date inform me I'd suggested her burner bar for our drinks date. A bit later, she told me that she'd already chosen the names for our babies."
"She did this very loudly. Imagine a woman speaking loudly enough for all the bar staff to hear that I'd picked the bar she takes dates to 'cause it's close to her home, but she doesn't like it enough to be sad if something happens and she can never come back to it."
"And then even more loudly, getting agitated and almost yelling about what names she's picked out for her children -- that one, the entire bar could hear. That was one of two times in my life when a bartender has closed my tab before I asked."
– Specialist_Fun9295
A Real Peach
"Had a dude tell me all about how his court-ordered anger management therapy was bs and he was getting off the meds as soon as the therapy ended."
"Edit to add: No, he never told me why he got ordered to go. Got kinda cagey about the whole thing and I didn't want to push too hard since he was giving off pretty strong 'already off my meds' vibes."
– SpicySnails
The Ritual
“ 'Every year for my birthday, me and my friends like to go in the woods and do a lot of drugs. I hope that doesn’t bother you.' …I was like 18 and not even old enough to drink yet. This was said after he had taken my hair out of my hair clip at the table and sniffed it. Our first and only date was at Applebees and he brought his best friend. I had to pay for both of them…"
"Edit: forgot to mention that the best friend was a girl who didn’t speak and just glared at me the whole time. I also had to drive both of them back to his house."
– girlinthegoldenboots
The Addict
"She talked me into going to the gambling boat on our first date after we had a nice dinner. She proceeded to lose 3 times what I lost in less than an hour. At the time I was an addiction counselor and saw too many signs. I never thought about a second date, not once."
– DramaEmotional6775
Miss Misanthrope
"I was on a date with a woman who was getting into a really negative spiral of conversation, about how she was going to school for nursing, but hated people. I somewhat desperately tried to turn things around by asking what she liked most about being a vet tech: I figured it'd be an easy, mood-lifting answer about hugging furry animals. I was wrong."
"She told me she really liked it when she was cleaning tartar off dog canines, and it all came off in one chunk."
"The bar was empty, and the bartender had been quietly eavesdropping at the far end of the bar. I watched him double over and convulse with silent laughter, as I fought to keep a straight face myself."
– Specialist_Fun9295
Listen, we all get a little nervous when meeting someone on a first date, and conversations don't go as smoothly as we expect.
Getting acquainted can be slightly awkward at first, but we're bound to warm up to our romantic interest and vice versa.
What you can never prepare for, however, is that one thing your date says that rubs you the wrong way, and there's no going back from that.
Sound familiar? We'd love to hear it!
Jane Rosenberg
Jane Rosenberg
