One of the most entertaining and useful forums on Reddit is called Am I The A**hole?.
Simply put, users can post an action they're considering or something they've done in the past and Reddit will tell them whether they're the jerk or whether their actions are justified.
A post on the subreddit centered around a date who skipped out on her half of the bill recently garnered a lot of attention.
Reddit user RustedCornHole told his story, entitled "WIBTA if I give the restaurant the name and phone number of my tinder date who LITERALLY JUST got up and left after the meal when it came up that we should split the check?"
"I'm sitting here now trying to decide what to do. She and I never discussed this dinner being my treat, and this is the place she suggested. I have half a mind to separate the checks, pay mine and leave her info on her check for the restaurant to sort out. Technically she dined and dashed."
In response to some people worrying, the author of the post assured everyone that he hadn't acted untoward:
"I'm going to preemptively tell you now this wasn't because I tried to get laid by just buying dinner and I'm not a creep. Edit: in our conversations I suggested coffee for our first meet up. For those wondering."
Then, RustedCornHole caught a lucky break!
"Update: SWEET KARMIC JUSTICE! Upon moving to the bar and talking to the bartender I found out that this girl had an open tab before I arrived. She LEFT HER DRIVER'S LICENSE AT THE BAR. According to the bartender she's a s***ty tipper and she's probably next door trying to get free drinks at the pool hall.
Since her tab was open and she's probably coming back anyway, he agreed to move her food items over to her tab. He said, 'f*** it it's not like she's gonna tip me anyways.'"
After the post went viral on the platform, the author returned to tell people how the situation turned out.
"Update again: WOW HOLY S*** THIS BLEW UP! Thanks kind stranger for the gold!
I still have yet to hear back from her even though I'm sure she's had to have gone back to close her tab. I'm not really down with confrontation, so I prefer it that way. Also RIP my in box! I've just logged on today and this was surprising. I'm getting to the responses as best as I can. D*** work has me busy AF."
theonewithcurlyhair could hardly believe the woman's behavior, and thought RustedCornHole was within his rights:
"NTA. Your luck was good too (with her tab). However I have a question. Did she say anything before leaving? It just seems unbelievably rude for someone to do this. Or I'm just incredibly naive"
kmcard wants to make sure the restaurant doesn't get punished for the woman's rudeness:
"No way should you have to pay for her, but it's not the restaurant's fault either. You could text/call her and let her know you're planning to do that, and that the restaurant is planning to pursue the issue with her (whether or not they are) maybe then she'll come back and deal with the bill.
Talk to your waiter about it, it's unlikely that they will be able to get their money from her, but it's worth asking. If you can easily afford it I would just cover it. NTA if you don't though"
flamingosfelices wasn't even sure the restaurant would let him stick his date with her half of the bill:
"NTA. But I doubt the restaurant would let you get away with this. It's more of a hassle and less uncertainty for them, and would likely just claim the entire amount with you.
I'm guessing they legally can hold you responsible for the full amount, but would actually be interested to learn more about the legal side of this."
Kill_Yourself_Mods has a plan to deal with people like RustedCornHole's date:
"Next time, send her to the McDonalds the next town over."
chaquedetail thinks action should have been taken right away:
"As it actually played out, NTA. However, as originally written, you absolutely WHBTA if you, for instance, had them split the checks, left cash for yours and a phone number on hers, then slunk out without saying anything to anyone. It's good that you talked to someone; that's the critical part.
If the bartender had said, "sucks man, don't know what to tell you," your only non-a-hole option at that point would be to suck it up and pay."
oklahomajobless also thought RustedCornHole ought to come to terms with the hard truth:
"The restaurant has no way, or no interest, in tracking down your date. All persons at the table, including you, are responsible for the bill. Some cities consider it a misdemeanor for an entire table to leave without paying the bill. You can't just not pay the restaurant."
NovemberAlphaKilo thought this instance was indicative of a larger problem:
"NTA - Society really needs to stop giving women free passes with this type of shit. I am sure she has a habit of using tinder dates as a way for her to go out for free."
allthedifference thinks everyone should be on equal footing, regardless of gender:
"NTA Everyone should assume they are paying for their own food unless otherwise decided."
PatriotSnowflake understood RustedCornHole's predicament, but knows how dating apps can be:
"NTA. It sounds like she used you for a free meal. When I was dating, I always planned on paying for two reasons: 1) I was usually the one who asked and; 2) we usually went where I wanted to go. ( this might sound inconsiderate but the way I figured it, if I asked and I was paying, we're doing what I wanted to do, if she didn't like it, oh well, at least I had fun) and yes if she asked, I still planned on paying because that's just how I was raised.
Props to you for asking and props to the bartender for being a bro about it. This story belongs in r/humansbeingbrosIMO.
Side rant: I actually stopped using dating apps. With the exception of 1 girl (who I ended up living with) literally all of them were either looking for a one night stand or stood me up."
Be sure to pay your half of the bill, everyone!
You have no idea the moral dilemma you're leaving behind when you stick your date with the responsibility.
Fortunately, it seems RustedCornHole's issue has been resolved thanks to the advice-givers of Reddit!
If you're navigating love, there is help. The book Single, Dating, Engaged, Married: Navigating Life and Love in the Modern Age is available here.
