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bad dates
Dating has a tendency to pay off, as sometimes you might meet people who, though they may not prove to their one true love, might end up becoming one of their best friends.
Then there are the dates people go on which, to put it mildly, they rather wish they hadn't.
Redditor xxibjt was eager to hear about the absolute worst dates people ever had, leading them to ask:
"What’s the worst date you’ve been on?"
Talk about moving too fast!
"Guy brought a ring to the first date."
"Angrily stormed out when I obviously said no, and then he came back and started beating on the window next to me from the outside."
"The restaurant manager had to walk me to my car because the guy was flipping out in the parking lot."
"Horrifying."- MPD1987
Some People Just Can't Bear To Show Up Alone
"Met through a dating app, we had decent conversation and she suggested we meet at a patio bar the next day."
"We met and it was fun."
"She asked if I wanted to meet 'some of her friends' at a nearby place."
"It seemed weird for a first date, but I agreed to meet her there."
"As we walk in, I immediately realize there’s some kind of organized function happening; people are all standing and mingling, there’s food laid out, and there’s printed papers on each table that read 'Welcome Springfield Class of 1991'."
"I turn to her saying 'hey I think there’s a reunion here' and she’s hugging someone."
"She says hi to a couple people then says, 'and this is Steve!'."
"My name isn’t Steve, she forgot my name."
"It was bizarre."
"I ended up staying for 45 minutes and eating a quesadilla as Steve, the reunion date, then told her I had an early morning."
"She texted me the next day, but I felt this one time, ghosting was ok."- FishHikeMountainBike
Multi-Level Date Fail...
"Girl in college asked me to be her date at a banquet."
"She tells me she’ll meet me at the venue."
"Wearing a suit, I showed up to a pyramid scheme presentation."
"I noticed two other guys dressed sharply, and they said the same girl said it was a date as well."- FlippyWraith
Awkward Season 2 GIF by The OfficeGiphy
Like Cinderella's Coach, It Was Gone By Midnight...
"He picked me up in a convertible that had the price written on the window in marker and all kinds of papers on it."
"I lived in a student dorm; he came to my door and left the car with the music blasting so everyone saw us leave."
"We had ice cream and went to see a movie."
"He left me at the movie theater and disappeared for about 30 minutes."
"He came back, we watched a movie, and then went to leave."
"No car was outside."
"He said it wasn’t his, and he had to return it."
"He took it for a test drive from a dealership."
"But he said he can take me back on the handlebars of his bike."
"We did that, with stops 'cause he was out of breath."
"Then he dropped me off a couple of blocks from the dorm 'cause you don’t want your friends to see'.”
"We had to see each other at work all summer, but we just looked the other way."
"I was 19."- Designer-Weight7520
Freeloader...
"I took a girl to Lagoon Amusement Park in Utah."
"We spent the whole day together riding the rides and enjoying the park."
"Resting on a bench in the evening, she told me 'I don't even like you'."
"'I just wanted free Lagoon tickets'."- Nannyphone7
Meow...
"She talked about her cat the whole time, didn't ask a thing about me."
"I didn't learn a thing about her other than she has a cat."
"I'm highly allergic to cats."- GrillDealing
Cat Love GIF by KiokuartGiphy
Not Exactly A Match Made In Heaven
"I matched on a dating app with a guy who turned out to be a friend's cousin."
"He was in his 30s, a few years older than me."
"We had decent chats on the app, though there were a few red flags."
"Like I was traveling for work to one of my company's warehouses, and I let him know I wouldn't be very available because I don't bring my personal phone with me during the day when I travel (too busy, and there's no service in those buildings anyway and have really long days) but he still got upset when I wasn't answering him fast enough. I gave him the benefit of the doubt because normally I'm pretty responsive, even though it really annoyed me.
"When I got back from traveling, he asked me to go out on a date."
'He was an alcoholic in recovery, so we agreed to meet for coffee at a certain Starbucks in my town."
"He didn't drive, so he'd get an Uber."
"On the day, I got showered and dressed, and then got a message from him that he needed to change the time."
"Annoying, but things happen."
"So I hang out at home for a while longer before heading over."
"When I'm one set of traffic lights away from the Starbucks, my phone pings and it's a message from him."
"His Uber took him to the wrong Starbucks. Could I meet him there instead?"
"They were pretty close to each other, so I replied that I would and made a u-turn to go back the quarter mile or so."
"I go inside and don't see him."
"I message him and he says he went back to the original Starbucks, but to stay where I am and he'd come back."
"I ordered a drink and, and as I'm finishing paying, a very large, sweaty man comes in and yells my name in this tiny Starbucks."
"Now, I knew from photos he was a big guy, but he had to have been at least a hundred pounds heavier than his picture."
"He gets in line to order a drink, and in between talking to the baristas, he's telling me about how he started to run back from the other Starbucks (again, they were not too far apart) and then jumped into some guy's car to get here quicker."
"A random guy, who apparently didn't speak much English, and just commandeered it."
"Then he sits down and starts talking at me."
"This was not a conversation, it was a monologue."
"He tells me the reason he doesn't drive was because of several DUIs and all about it."
"He tells me how his AA meetings are in a bar."
"Weird choice."
" He tells me about how his alcoholism means he has to live with his parents, and that's why he doesn't have a job."
"He tells me all about his war injury (which, to be fair, resulted in him losing a leg)."
"He tells me what kind of music he likes and asks if I have tattoos and/or piercings."
"Before I can answer (no), he stands up and lifts his pants to show me his tattoos and his shirt to show me his nipple piercings!"
"He tells me he only wears Under Armour, and the sporting goods store in the same plaza was closing and having huge sales, and he wanted to walk over."
"I didn't know how to extract myself from the situation, so...I went with him."
"We go in, and he is piling up his desired purchases."
"I don't pick up anything."
"We get in the very long checkout line, and when we're a few people from the front, he realizes he forgot to check out the shoes."
"He hands me his pile and jogs off."
"I get to the front of the line before he comes back, so I step aside and let several people behind me go."
"He comes back and we go to the next open register to pay."
"The total is over $200, at which point he tells me his mother controls his money and was going to be very upset with him."
"We start walking back to the other end of the plaza where my car was parked, and we pass a pet store."
"He decides he's going to run in and get live crickets for his lizard, which I did not know he had."
"Not my kind of pet, but to each his own."
" I finally took this opportunity to duck out and made up a lie about a family dinner."
"He asked for my phone number, which I declined to give (I always wait until after the first date because I've had some bad experiences), saying I'd message it to him later, but I really had to run."
"He then drops on me that he's in the middle of his second divorce and he also had a failed engagement."
"I booked it so fast to my car and deleted him from whatever dating app we matched on."- Ana169
No Magical Gathering Here...
"Met him online, and it should have been a red flag that he only had one photo, a picture of him in his uniform when he was in the Army a couple of years prior."
"When I saw him in person, he was 100 pounds heavier and I didn’t recognize him."
"He was also wearing a camouflage kilt."
"He spent half the date talking about his recent ex-girlfriend and how he loved her so much more than she ever loved him."
"The date was at a Mexican restaurant with huge portions, and I couldn’t finish my meal because I was full."
"He told me, 'We don’t waste food around here,' and went on a five-minute rant about how there are starving people in the world and that we should always clear our plates.
"I said 'no problem, I can take the rest home' but he took the plate from me and ate the rest of my food."
"He tried holding my hand on the way out the door, and then asked me if I wanted to meet up with him the next morning to play Magic the Gathering."
"I respectfully declined."- Luna_Organa
Talk About Poker Face...
"Halfway through the date he goes, 'I don’t think I experience emotion'.”
"For the rest of the date I was convinced he might kill me."- discocowgirl5
Tired Blank Face GIFGiphy
Speed Is Not The Important Factor Of "Moving On"...
"I went out with a cop on our first date."
"He had recently broken up with his girlfriend and wanted to move on."
"Well, he took me to this really nice restaurant, one of the waitress came up to him while we were eating and asked my date 'Wtf is this?'… looking at me."
"I then find out she’s cousins with his ex girlfriend and he took me there for the cousin to see us together and for the cousin to tell his ex and make her jealous."
"F*cking idiot."
"Never went out with him again."
"He ended up marrying his ex."- paca1
In Case You Ever Wonder If Screen Addiction Isn't Real...
"One time I went on a date where the guy played games the entire time on the little table top register thing some restaurants have."-sentpostcard
Splitting The Bill On The First Date Is Customary...
"Met a chick by mistake, we set a date, we get to eat on a restaurant on the city center, 5 minutes later, her nephews appeared on the place, she asked me if we can buy them lunch, I said no, I didn't have the budget for so many people...she gets upset and starts arguing as if it was mandatory."
"I went to the bathroom and left by a side door."
"The whole tab was on her."- mingocr83
The Loud House Eating GIF by NickelodeonGiphy
Everyone Deserves A Second Chance... A Third, Not So Much...
"The second day I went on with this girl, she basically spent the entire date aggressively complaining about her co-workers."
"She came off as the biggest bitch in the world."
"She didn't come off great on the first day but it was the first date I had had in a while."
"But the second date that was all she talked about."
"No empathy, no compassion."
"Just 'f*ck these people'."
"Didn't really ask me about anything."
"Just complained about her co-workers."- GreenFox1505
Did They Think They Could Avoid Him... On A Ship?
"The one where the girl(s) didn't show up."
"I had moved (unwillingly) a few months before to the midwest."
"I was in OK shape, not the best but OK."
"Went on a cruise with my immediate family a few months later."
"Started talking with a few girls and met two girls that were from two towns away from where the family had moved."
"I asked the girls if they would like to meet for dinner and they said yes."
"I wasn't looking to get laid or anything, I was just lonely as hell because I didn't know anyone around."
"I sat there for 45 minutes before I ordered dinner for myself and I felt like complete and utter shit for the rest of the trip."
"They could have just said no."
"Haven't thought of that in years."- MickCollins
Totally Nuts...
"I once met a guy who not only told me about the time he ended up in emergency because of a tick bite to the nutsack, but he then proceeded to bring said tick out of his wallet in a ziplock bag."
"Wild move imo."- VitaminMorphine
There's an old saying that goes "before you find the princess, you'll need to slay a few dragons".
An apt metaphor for dating, even though there is little doubt that just about everyone would gladly attempt to slay a dragon before reliving their worst date.