I left one relationship because the guy had a lot of stuff to work out and would snipe at me over seemingly nothing in particular. It got to the point where I felt exhausted just seeing him. I knew that once our time together began to feel like a chore, that it was time for me to go.
After Redditor bate4her2hermaster asked the online community, "In what moment did you realize that an ex (who you thought would be 'the one') was absolutely NOT 'the one'"? people shared their stories.
"When she came home from work..."
When she came home from work one day and the first thing that popped into my mind was "well, there went my day".
Just a normal day, no fight the night before, no stress, just my subconscious finally making himself heard.
"He had a kid..."
He had a kid that lived in another state that he only saw a few times a year.
On 4/20 one year, he decided to stay for our city's 4/20 festival instead of go home for his child's birthday. Quote - "Little Man will understand. It's 2 Chainz."
Didn't stay with him much longer after that.
"The biggest moment I remember..."
The biggest moment I remember is the night of my sorority initiation ceremony. I didn't have my phone for a few hours and in response to him not being able to get a hold of me he went and got two sleeve tattoos. They were done in his friend's basement and they looked like it too.
"When my mom called me..."
When my mom called me and said that I needed to come to the house (30 min away) because she didn't know how much longer my grandfather was going to make it. She insisted that I let my gf at the time drive me, because she didn't want me driving upset, as I was very close with my pawpaw. Gf agreed... I threw on some shoes and was ready to go. Gf proceeded to get in the shower. And then blow dry and straighten her hair. And then do her make up.
My mother called when we were 15 minutes away and told me that he'd passed. Had we left when we were supposed to, I would've gotten to say good bye.
"One of my exes..."
One of my exes was a stickler about money to the point it felt petty. Every time we went out to eat, even after dating for 2 years, he would flag down the waiter and say, "We need the check split in half. Evenly." If we would spend $5 at the grocery store buying spaghetti and sauce, he would ask me to pay half.
Anyway, my 17 year old cat was dying, and I was heartbroken. The day I said goodbye to her, my ex (then boyfriend) took me out for ice cream. We shared a $5 sundae at Dairy Queen. He paid! I was so happy and touched by the small gesture during the worst day of my life. But then in the car afterwards, he asked me if we should "settle up now or... because, I mean... the sundae was $4.95 and I don't think you gave me any money for it," and I lost it. I threw a $20 at him and cried.
Listen, I don't expect men to foot the bill all the time, and I definitely like to be fair, but buying your long term girlfriend a $5 sundae when she's absolutely distraught is not unreasonable.
"I got the hell out of Dodge fast!"
When I overheard her conversation with her coworker wherein they were talking about her co-worker's desire for children while her husband wanted to wait. My ex gave the advice of, "if I were in your shoes, I'd just stop taking my birth control and not tell him."
I got the hell out of Dodge fast!
"When I told him..."
When I told him I had just found out my mom was leaving my dad for someone else, and he started complaining about his day at work.
"When she told me she needed a few weeks..."
When she told me she needed a few weeks to herself to "figure things out." What she was actually doing was planning her wedding to a guy she met at work.
"When she complained..."
When she complained about visiting my father in the hospital (he had a mini stroke), and demanded we get back to my house to watch a movie and cuddle.
Kicked her to the curb about three months later.
"His answer was a full minute..."
When we were having the "should we stay together and work it out or go our separate ways" discussion and he said he didn't want me to go. I asked him why.
His answer was a full minute of silence staring at the table, completely at a loss for what to say. He couldn't come up with any reason why he wanted me to stay.
That silence said more than a million words ever could.
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