Lonely, heartbreaking, and often shocking confessions are often spilled out, sometimes to complete strangers, when someone is on their deathbed. We don't know what may be on the other side, and often to let ourselves go in peace we need to make peace with the world we are leaving.
There seems to be a link between the human conscience, or soul if you believe that, which needs to find harmony with the life lived before moving on to death. Some people found that the confessions helped to aid them in moving on to that next phase.
Redditor random_guy_somewhere wanted to know what confessions people have been told by the sick and dying. What shocked them or left a lasting impression?
On Ask Reddit, random_guy_somewhere asked:
"People who have heard deathbed confessions, what were some interesting ones?"
Some of these answers really pull at your heart strings, and some are even comical. Here were a few of the best answers.
"When I was in hospital, the guy in the bed next to me just asked to stop taking his meds as he was ready to die. Last thing I heard him say was 'There's no one waiting for me at home, so I'm going where they are.'"
"Wasn't really a shocking confession, just a lonely and heartbreaking one."
"I'm a nurse. If a patient refuses medical treatment, and they are deemed to be mentally fit to make their own decisions, we absolutely can not force them to continue with treatment. We explain the risks and what could happen if they don't get treated, if the patient says they still don't want treatment or medication, then that's tough sh*t for us. At the end of the day, the patient (or POA in cases of developmental /cognitive disabilities) has full body autonomy."
The concept of letting one pass on their own terms at the end of life or in the case of a terminal illness is a highly debated one. Some of the commenter began discussing the topic.
"I worked in aged care for a short time. One of our clients (patient) was in terrible condition and refused food and water, there was nothing we could do and she passed the next day. It's so sad we don't offer euthanasia. For that client it would've been more dignified than having to starving oneself."
"Also I imagine the experience of (chosen) death could be a lot more comfortable if helped along with morphine/fentanyl/etc. - going out in a pleasurable high rather than starving, dehydrated, and in enough pain to choose to end treatment."
Okay, this one is a little funny.
"Not my story but that of a hospice worker who spoke to my class. For those who don't know, hospice is a method of end-of-life care that focuses on alleviating the emotional & physical pain of a dying person to ease their passing rather than combatting their imminent death."
"One of her patients was a bed-bound woman in her 90s who was generally unresponsive but had flashes of recognition & engagement. It's hard to gauge the level to which unresponsive patients are detached from their surroundings, so they encourage family members to keep their company in hopes of soothing the patient. Now this patient was from a U.S. state that prided itself on its state university (and the university's football team). The woman's family had attended this university for four or five generations. During her hospice care, however, her great-granddaughter was the first in their family to decide to go to a different school—the rival state's university, in fact. Her family was supportive of her decision but often joked about her being the 'rebel' or 'Judas' or what-have-you."
"One day, they were all sitting around the woman's bedside, teasing the girl about her decision. Suddenly, the patient sat up, looked at her great-granddaughter, said, 'Traitor,' and f*cking DIED."
Was it really a confession?
"My grandfather had pretty terrible dementia and he kept making deathbed confessions as he knew he didn't have much time left. They were often about witnessing a murder and not telling anyone, but each time he confessed to us the details changed. It happened a couple of times a day over the course of his final week. We finally figured out that he would watch the local news and hear about these things happening then would think he had actually witnessed them."
- astrobre
"There I saw him with the gun standing over that man..... More at 5 o'clock"
Not her real mother.
"I didn't see it, but my aunt watched her elderly mother fall down the stairs and confess just before she died that she wasn't her biological mother."
"She told my aunt that her oldest sister was actually her mother. The sister had gotten pregnant too young and the mom said it was hers. A common way of handling it back then. She revealed it in her very last breath."
- usf_edd
"Jack Nicholson had this same thing happen to him. His mother was too young and grandmother raised him as her son and his mother as his sister he didn't find out till he was like 20?!?"
"The crazy thing is he found out from a journalist while being interviewed. They knew before him."
Handy-man confessions.
"I worked at a hospital in Garmisch-Partenkirchen, a small town near Munich for the last 14 years. My job there is not fancy at all, I move people around, throw the trash out and occasionally I take care of some handy-like work (fix a leaking shower head and stuff like that)."
"As you can imagine, I get to see a lot of patients that come and go, some of them pass away (such is life, I guess). I remember a few instances of people confessing to me their biggest regrets, here are some examples:
- "An old polish woman, told me that she regretted 'not sleeping with Hitler when she had the chance' (her words). I wanted to ask her about more context, but I was afraid, to be honest."
- "Another notable example was an old truck driver that used to work for an Easter Germany company, he told me that he once run over some kids with his truck and was too afraid to stop and check if they were ok."
- "Once another Polish lady told me that she used to be a prostitute during 2nd World War and that she slept with 'very high up' people in the government. She told me that she did not regret that part of her life, but that she could not tell anyone and that was a heavy emotional drag."
- - lyes_about_expertise
Final conversations.
"Not a deathbed confession, but the last conversation I had with my grandfather has always stuck with me. He had Parkinson's, and lived on a farm outside of town. One day he looked at me and said 'I'm getting too old to take care of Mom (my grandmother). I need you to do that for me, okay?' His health deteriorated pretty rapidly from that point onward."
"I still call my grandmother every single day, and try to get back home whenever I can to help out around the farm."
Worry was keeping him here.
"My grandpa passed away the day after my dad told him that everything was taken care of financially and healthcare wise for my grandma who had Alzheimer's. My grandpa had lung cancer and was still walking around and fighting and trying to live to take care of her, but basically let go once my dad told him he could."
"My dad had made sure everyone came and visited the week prior at some point because it could have been any day, which had been the case for the last several months. But it wasn't until he said, 'Dad, I have it covered. You have nothing to worry about. She is taken care of. Take care of yourself now.' That my grandpa let go."
These confessions are often personal, filled with guilt from not living the lives they wanted to or over a horrible deed they cannot undo.
Sometimes those confessions are the last piece of the puzzle that let us move on to the afterlife, whatever that may be. Whether you believe in the soul or not, it is an interesting phenomenon in the human experience of life transitioning to death.
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