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People Share The First Date Fails That Were Total Deal Breakers

Two people talking with cups of coffee
Photo by Chewy on Unsplash

Reddit user whitneywestmoreland asked: 'What’s something that happened on a first date that made you decide against a second date?'

Dating is complicated, because it can be really awkward, but if we want to find a partner, it's an activity we just kind of have to do.

The most frustrating thing about it, though, is that everything can seem to be going fine... until it isn't. The date is going well, the person we're with is charming, we're having a nice time together, but then a dealbreaker makes an unfortunate appearance.


Redditor whitneywestmoreland asked:

"What's something that happened on a first date that made you decide against a second date?"

Not Wowing Enough

​"The date felt more like a job interview to fill a position, rather than an actual date. He gave off a vibe of someone who wasn't into getting to know me as a person, but just listed his wants and needs."

"So at the end of the date, he asked how I thought it went, and I said I didn't feel a click or a match."

"And he said yeah and that he was missing that 'wow factor.'"

"So I laughed my a** off (slightly offended) on the car ride home. Gosh, I had no idea I was auditioning for a contest."

"I was happy we only went for drinks, but even that felt a bit too long."

- Selfish_Kitty

Not As Attractive As One Might Think

"He threw a temper tantrum because the restaurant he wanted to go to was closed due to the tropical storm that was going on."

"It's sad because I was having a great time walking around Manhattan while the storm raged. I had every intention of going home with him until he had that tantrum."

- msspider66

Let the Past Go

"I took her to dinner and then took her to a late-night car meet. Upon arriving at the meet, she started s**t with several other girls she had beef with in high school... and hasn’t talked to since high school."

"We were well into our 20s. She was even older than me."

"I don’t get how some people make high school beef their entire personality for years."

- TheThrowawayMouse

Different Senses of Humor

"We went to her place to watch movies and we chose 'Kung Fu Panda 2.' From the moment it began, she proceeded to cackle at every single joke. Anything that could even be perceived as mildly funny set her off like the Wicked Witch of the West."

"I know some people have interesting laughs and that wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't constant from beginning to end."

"After that, she put on 'Iron Man,' and the same thing happened, witch cackling the entire movie."

"There's a point in the movie where a character's phone goes off, and the ringtone is an old 'Iron Man' theme, which made me chuckle."

"She turned to me and said, 'You laugh at all the weirdest parts!'"

"The second the movie was over, I got out of there and did not see her again."

- J-Dizzle42

Quite the Conversationalist

"He said nothing. I get he was nervous but I was engaging. I asked questions that should have led to at least a few sentences of conversation, but no, one-word answers only."

"It was dinner and a movie so our only opportunity to talk was dinner. It was like pulling teeth. No thanks, no second date."

- redditreader_aitafan

Ready to Settle Down

"She kept talking about the 'emergency d**k' she had stashed around the city."

"She was like, 'I've been really busy with [grad] school, but I don't go without. I have plenty of emergency d**k around town.'"

"And when I say she kept going on, I mean she KEPT GOING ON. She was telling me about the two guys downtown, three in the suburbs, one near campus, and two in her apartment complex."

"It honestly sounded like I was new to town and she was giving me a rundown of all the best places to visit."

"It was just weird."

"She also said she was looking to settle down into a relationship (whereas she had only been in situationships before). She also said she had a 'virgin heart.'"

- callmevicious

"I really want to know what she hoped to accomplish by sharing all that with him."

"Clearly, she expected him to be impressed in some way."

- _Halboro_

"It sounds like she wanted him to be her everyday d**k and take her heart virginity!"

- illustrious_ocelot_

In It For the Food

"I went on a date with a woman from the office. I thought we had good chemistry and got along well."

"Later in the date, she couldn't find her phone, so I tried calling it, and someone from the restaurant where we'd had dinner answered."

"I went back in for her to get it, and the waiter showed me I was saved in her contacts as 'Free Food.'"

- Sol-Blackguy

A Terrible Tipper

"He insisted on paying for our dinner instead of going Dutch, and then he totally stiffed the server."

"I tried to leave a tip and he got p**sed at me because he was paying and it was his decision to tip or not."

- Westonworld

Yeah, That... That Would Do It

"He just kept making a weird amount of jokes about tapeworms?"

"Also, this happened while we were eating sushi, just in case anyone was wondering."

- oldfarmhousechutney

Too Close to Home

"This happened to my sister, but she found out the guy had the same uncommon last name as her."

"Then when she asked where he was from, it was the same small town that our great grandparents are from."

"They awkwardly laughed and just immediately ended the date."

- LadderUpset

A Lot to Take In At Once

"She told me that aliens cause jet lag and that I have the ghost of a fisherman following me around named Samuel (on top of the 20 other bats**t things she said at dinner)."

"This was last night, and I'm still processing."

- RVBY1977

Disrespectful From the Very Beginning

"Very recently, a woman asked me when I would get a real career."

"I love what I do. I'm a union stagehand in a major entertainment city. I have been in my industry for over 20 years, toured the country, toured the world, and make a comfortable living."

"Yeah, no. That's pretty demeaning and I'm out."

- azorianmilk

Sixth Grade Gossip Vibes

"She kept writing to her friends on WhatsApp a play-by-play of the date instead of listening to me, so I stood up, paid my dinner, and left because I found it disrespectful as f**k."

- Dune_Asmr

An Accidental Affair

"I went to dinner with a girl who I'd been crushing on for quite some time. It seemed to be going well, and we ended up back at her place, watching a movie or something."

"Out of nowhere, her boyfriend (of whom I was not aware) came back from out of town and stopped in unexpectedly."

"He and I had a super awkward conversation for a few minutes, and then the two of them disappeared into another room for a minute or two."

"She came back and said something to the effect of, 'I don't have a place for you. I'm sorry.'"

"I just kind of got in my car and drove home, with one of the strangest feelings that I'd ever felt."

"At some point, a few minutes into the journey, I couldn't contain myself and busted out laughing."

- Richard_Thickens

We can absolutely understand why these would be causes for no second date. From awkward to straight-up creepy, these don't feel like scenarios that we'd willingly sign up for twice.

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