How well do you know your neighbors?
Depending on your view, whether it's through an apartment window or over the backyard fence, you might have the best seat at witnessing the crazy things your neighbors do.
But be careful about giving in to gossip, for they may be peeking in on your weird antics too.
No one is safe where all the world truly is a stage as Shakespeare mightily observed when giving voice to Jaques from As You Like It.
Curious to hear from all of us, merely players, Redditor Karin_Loo asked:
"What strange thing is your neighbor doing?"
There are friendly neighbors and those who aren't exactly friend material.
Racecar Driver
"My neighbor next door is kind of like Boomhauer at 70. He's been losing it for about a year now. He's outside painting his house with interior paint and putting chicken wire over the siding. We stay out of it unless his wife wants us to call an ambulance again."
"They're both sweet but I can't understand a word he says. This past two months, he took his wife's car, raced it and tore it up, hit a mailbox in her new truck (replacing her car he destroyed) and broken her wrist and dropped dead in the grocery store but CPR worked and he's okay now."
– EmmelineTx
Garden Wars
"My neighbor lost her mind when she went out of town and came back to find we'd mulched our entire back yard. To 'pay us back' for beating her to the punch, she was so mad she started roping off her fence line. (We didn't mulch near her fence line.)"
"We ignored her for about 2 months while she continued to escalate the situation. Putting tubs over my mom's plants, digging up shrubs and flowers that she deemed 'to close to the fence' and more."
"It finally peaked in June of last year when my mom put flags in the ground for summer and she called the police on us. I spent my birthday explaining what she had done and that she kept getting worse over time."
"Policeman went to her house, was in there for a very long time, and finally left with her chasing him outside screaming some nonsense."
"Now, we just sit and say nothing to her. She tried to start it again but it didn't get very far."
– amyscactus
Surprise Pool Party
"When I was a kid, we had these neighbours who just assumed the mantle of my parents' best friends. One day we got home to find their kids in our pool, so my dad asked how they got into our yard."
"Turns out the neighbours had gotten tired of waiting for my parents to get home and visiting like usual people, so they decided to just take down a piece of the wall between our properties and put a small gate there instead."
– Odd-Watercress1478
Tree Attack
"Across the street woman literarily went fully insane because someone, either the city or gardeners cut a few branches off her tree. She made signs, threw red paint on the tree to symbolize blood, threw caution tape all over it, now has built a huge cage around the tree."
"It was just a few branches and the tree was never hurt. This has been going on for over 6 months she just lost her mind completely."
– Marsupialize
It's only getting weirder.
Sharing The Fancy Feast
"Across the street neighbor feeds the stray cats outside. After he empties the food on their plate, he runs his fingers inside of the can and licks the remaining cat food off his fingers."
– NastyLittleGyal
"Building a bunker. But this has been going on for at least 10 years. Running his bobcat in the middle of the night. He works for the government so maybe he knows something we don't."
– lck44
Anxiety Man
"I can relate. We had a neighbor who worked for the Gov. and always used his 'cryptic voice' to let everyone know he knew things so he was building a compound."
"It was a wild thing to have people ask me if the military had a set up above my place ( up the mountain ). He had his place fenced with corner towers and super bright lights. Really, the place looked like a prison."
"We took him to court because the area was lit up all night like a city. Y2K fizzled and so did the Gov Dude. Guess it was fun while it lasted."
– DeadSheepLane
Fore!
"Hunting with a flashlight for golf balls in my yard, that he hit over into my yard because he refuses to change his launch angle when he practices his swing. Bonus points for being both drunk, and in his underwear."
"Time will tell how I will reciprocate his trespassing. Should be fun."
– Cyanora
The Kitty's Ball
"It's a cute kind of strange, but she dances with her cat every single night. She's gets home at 10 ish every night, turns on a little light music, the cat gets on her bed and they dance for a few minutes."
"She always opens the window, and has great taste in some old jazz records, so I don't ever complain, but sometimes I can't help but watch for a second at how pure and wholesome it is."
– Nexus6Leon
The Gospel Truth
"I've got a new neighbor that sets up a led lit karaoke machine to sing sermons on randomly. He'll go for several hours when he's fired up. Just him on the steps outside his apartment with his karaoke machine singing gospel style sermons about the Lord punishing sinners and saving the righteous. Then he goes back to smoking pot and drinking on the porch with the guys down the street."
"I can't decide if he's more or less annoying than the guy always trying to block street parking like he owns it."
– Leftfeet
The Tick
"Our neighbor looks in our mailbox every day when she checks her mail. Our mailboxes sit side by side. It's very quick, almost like it's a tick. I have no idea what she's doing. I normally have already got our mail out."
"We just moved into this neighborhood about 3 months ago and have never met her. She wears a uniform that looks like a police officer. We were told she works at the local jail. Its very strange.... and I believe it's illegal."
– Boxermom710
It's A Choice
"The lady across the street from me is the only one of my neighbors that I haven’t met. Every afternoon, she vacuums her driveway. She pays for a gardener, but I always see her out there spraying weed killer on the yard, or raking the gravel."
"She has one car, with a driveway and a garage that she can park it in. She puts up traffic cones and 'No Parking' signs along the street, even though street parking for up to 36 hours is legal in my city, and in the 3 years that I’ve lived in this house, I have never seen anyone obstruct her driveway with or without the cones and signs."
– jhumph88
You can't make these up. Fortunately for us, these anecdotes wrote themselves.
Private Concert
"My neighbor has a nightly ritual of serenading his garden gnomes with a ukulele. The gnomes seem to appreciate it, but I’m still trying to figure out if they’re the real audience."
– CelestialCherryCharm
The Ritual
"He raises the national battle flag on the flagpole in the yard, walks thoughtfully around the yard, then drinks some vodka, lowers the flag and enters the house with the look of a man who has made some decision and won over everyone."
– MrHmuriy
Sprinkling The Lawn
"My neighbors, both the husband and wife, pee in their front yard. As far as I know, they aren’t hoarders. Now they’re teaching their kids (boy and girl) to pee in their front yard as well. It would be hilarious if their yard didn’t face my front window. Our guests can’t believe it. It’s so gross; you never want to see that much of people that size."
"This is in a suburb in Hawaii."
– thebadhedgehog5
George's Bedtime Protocol
"Every night at about 10, Ole George turns on his back porch light, knocks slowly 3 times on the door, waits about 10 seconds then turns off the light."
" 'Night George."
– Plastic-Sentence9429
The Most Happiest Yard On Earth
"My neighbors have been building Disneyland in their backyard for their kids. There are contractors there every weekend. All I want to do is sunbathe naked in my backyard and smoke weed without being disturbed by happy children."
"But I'm serious! They built a treehouse that directly looks over my privacy fence. The whole backyard is themed."
– burnedimage
It's funny the things people do when they think no one is watching.
But let's face it. You know you're just as weird as your neighbors, and the things they might find awkwardly quirky about what you do when you're solo could be circulating in the rumor mill.
Are your ears burning yet?
@JamesTate121/X
