Our first relationship in life is with our parents or guardians. They help shape who we'll become as adults.
But that doesn't mean they're not humans—just like their children.
Which—like all humans—means they may do or say things that annoy or aggravate the people around them.
Reddit user dentalbeans asked:
"What’s something your parents do now you’re an adult that drives you up the wall?"
Act Like Children
"Mine were always like that. It was embarrassing when they tried to discipline me."
"I was like, I’ve seen the way you act and you’re basically another kid."
"Some parents don’t realise their authority is something they have to create and it doesn’t just happen."
~ Rich-Distance-6509
"Growing up, you start to realize how many times your parents throw a tantrum and act childish when things don't go their way."
~ KattoCraft
Unsolicited Advice
"Giving unsolicited advice about everything from my job to my dating life as if I haven’t got it somewhat figured out by now."
~ beautiful_moody101
"Our parents are deceased (wife's and mine both) so WE are the parents."
"My wife is constantly sticking her nose in the kids and grandkids business—comments, unsolicited advice, etc..."
"I hated that when it happened to me and vowed I would never 'butt in' and I don't. If I'm asked, I'll comment, but otherwise, I live by the rule 'not my circus, not my monkeys!'."
~ drgene4955
Do As I Say, Not As I Do
"My dad gives me driving advice."
"I've been driving for 20 years with no fines or accidents. He has never gone more than 5."
"He had an accident last year that was his fault and totaled 3 cars. I drove 3 hours to pick him up, I waited 5 hours for him at the hospital."
"On the way back home, he criticized my driving."
~ Soopercow
Constant Bickering
"They're 88 and they have been married 67 years, so I don't expect them to change."
"But it drives me mad."
"I once listened to them bicker for half an hour about buying lightbulbs."
"Mom wanted matching ones in a chandelier, where the bulbs are visible, dad wanted to use whatever mismatched bulb would fit so he wouldn't have to pay $30 for a set of matching bulbs."
"I almost went on Amazon and just ordered the damn things myself so they'd stop fighting over such a stupid thing."
"They can easily afford light bulbs."
"I ordered new bolts for their toilet seat after it came up multiple times during a weekend visit."
~ CraftFamiliar5243
Weaponized Incompetence
"Learned helplessness towards technology."
"My mom will wait weeks to use the printer until I come home and change the toner cartridge instead of reading the directions how to do it."
~ DeathSpiral321
"My mum just assumes that she's not going to understand something, so she doesn't bother to try."
"It's immensely frustrating."
~ boojes
"I’m 53 and I’m trying hard to break that stereotype."
"My kids sigh when I switched from an Android phone to an iPhone and tried to snatch it out of my hand to do it themselves. I said I want to learn myself so I’m not the helpless old fogey that can’t use technology had has to wait for one of them to sort it."
"Their dad however rings the kids constantly for tech help and refuses to do it himself."
"Ironically this guy used to rant at his mother twice a year when he had to change the clock on the video player because she couldn’t do it."
~ Prudent_Way2067
Hyper Critical
"Comment on things they'd never say to someone else—like how we decorated our home or what we've done with our garden."
"I asked my mother once why she thought she could come into our home and act that way. She was visibly rattled and tried to laugh it off."
~ LordyIHopeThereIsPie
"I have an aunt like that. Unfortunately we are blood related but I'd rather not acknowledge it.
"She'll come in and start stating that she wouldn't have painted a room that color or put the TV there or that she doesn't like that rug, etc..."
"I've only seen her 3 times in the past 10 years and that's too many times."
~ Historical_Gur_3054
Tacky Guilt Gifts
"Mine just comes over with tacky things as gifts, says she knows I probably won't like it, and makes me feel guilty if I don't use it."
"She gave my poor husband a wooden, painted golden retriever for outside that one of her friends made out of plywood. We don't even own a golden retriever and it has creepy, black painted, soulless eyes."
"I kept it in the garage for a while until she boo-hooed about it a few times, and now it's in one of our flowerbeds, much to our dismay."
"I feel like I should be grateful she thinks about us, but I'd also like to decorate my own house."
"A couple years ago we all went to a garden center together and my husband pointed out a rose bush he liked. He told me to pick which one we should get and I tried to get one with buds and a nice shape."
"My mom had a fit and carried one with a weird shape and all the flowers already open to the register. Would have been different if she was paying, but I now have a $50 rose bush that has pretty flowers but a weird shape I've been trying to correct with pruning."
~ Amie91280
Politics
"Turn everything into politics."
~ Caseated_Omentum
"My dad, everything is political—traffic, it’s Biden fault! Raining, Biden did it!"
"Like jeez, stfu..."
~ boyididit
"My dad somehow turns every conversation to how dumb electric cars are, but Musk is great and I’m a socialist or something."
"Dude, I was talking about a great burger I ate."
"I wish I could talk to my dad about just normal sh*t."
~ metallaholic
"Yes! My dad does this."
"You walk on eggshells around him, because if you bring up anything he might just turn it into a rant about Biden, wokeness, gender/LGBTQ+, etc..."
"It’s exhausting having him around."
~ Supac084
"My father likes to complain about snowflakes and safe spaces."
"He doesn’t seem to realize that he is always in a safe space himself any time we are around him, because he can be such a snowflake."
"It’s just easier for us that way."
~ Elias_Fakanami
Treated Like A Child
"They still ask if I've made any new friends, like I'm still rocking the lunchbox and playground combo!"
"Sometimes my mom will say something weird that makes me ask her how old she thinks I am. She will pause and laugh and admit she was thinking I was in my mid-twenties. I’m 46."
~ newhappyrainbow
"My mother still calls me a young girl even though I am neither young nor a girl, and she doesn't want to acknowledge that she is a smother now."
~ Stormhound
Double Standard
"This has bugged me since I was a teen and I'm now 37."
"They'd bi*ch about me playing video games all day, while they vegged out on reality TV or some sh*t."
"Like, at least my brain is functioning."
~ Slightly_Smaug
"Oh my god, thissss. I’m trash for playing games in the evening to chill, but watching mindless TV is okay‽‽"
~ Thalamic_Cub
"Same here. Video games are rotting my brain, but apparently watching reality television for 4+ hours a night while also scrolling through Facebook is different."
~ Tall_Air5894
Priorities
"Well, after my father's death forty years ago, my mother flung herself into one long-term affair after another with married men she knew from high school.
Basically, if one of them needed her to do anything, she was there for them in an instant. If her long-time lover wanted her to accompany him on a two-week road trip, she was in."
"But when it came to her grandchildren who lived a scant five miles away? Couldn't be bothered."
"Two examples:"
"1) The number of times our kids actually stayed at her place could be counted on one hand. But one time I had a business function and we were desperate. So she finally consented.
"The next morning, our youngest son had a soccer game, so she met us in a Whole Foods parking lot. My mother arrives dressed to the nines.
"'Hey, Mom. Why don't you come watch the game? It'll last thirty minutes'."
"'Why would I do that?'."
"Repeat this scenario for every baseball game, soccer game, violin recital, school play, band concert, and everything else for twenty years. My son once had a band concert literally a quarter mile from her apartment, but she just couldn't make it."
"But if one of her lovers needed anything? On it like white on rice."
"2) My mother does have a fetish for birthdays. So before each of our kids' birthdays, she'd obsess over what to buy them. But when she arrived with the present, she'd pull into the driveway, honk the horn, and shove it into the hands of our kids."
"I would always invite her in and she would always say, 'No. David [married boyfriend] needs me to do....' and then she'd name some random errand."
"Now at age 90, she doesn't understand why her grandchildren are not close to her."
~ AnybodySeeMyKeys
Saving Leftovers Forever
"My mom banishes half of every meal to the shadow realm. She has 2 full-sized freezers in the garage with 4 portions of every meal from the past 2 years."
"One time she gave us cupcakes that she’d been gifted 4 years before and that was back when she only had 1 extra freezer."
"There are few things she hates more than hoarding, but yesterday’s dinner is the one exception."
~ ohfuckthebeesescaped
"My mother also used to treat the freezer as 'indefinite' storage."
"If it could be frozen, we had a surplus. Whether that's soup, bread, corn, wtf ever."
"'No, mom. After 12 months, it's not just as good'."
~ Boomerw4ang
No Respect For Privacy
"Both my parents were reporters/journalists. They have NO sense of when they're being way too nosey about my personal life."
~ Catfist
"OMG yes! My mother wanted to join the police when she was young but she wasn't tall enough (late 1970s)."
"All I can say is THANK F*CK, because she would have been absolutely terrifying with all that training to enhance her natural and diabolical inclination to interrogate me into the ground."
~ kerriheave
Ignoring Their Health
"They refuse to go to the doctor. It’s been at least 15 years since they’ve been."
"There is obvious health problems that worry me to death but if I bring it up they go off on me. Mom is almost blind because she needs cataract surgery but refuses."
"They’re in their 70’s now and all they do is sit at home and drink vodka all day long until they pass out. They get pissed because I don’t go visit often because I can’t stand it."
"It’s just hard because I love them and I want what’s best for them."
~ Glum_Reason308
Yelling
"Just start yelling over the smallest of inconveniences."
"I didn't realize that wasn't normal until I moved in with roommates and it was just so quiet."
~ FlavouredBeanJuice
"Oof, yeah, realising not everyone’s dads screamed at them about the slightest thing then went back to smiley happy dad."
"Or that most families don’t orient their actions around keeping dad chill and not triggered."
~ Thalamic_Cub
"Same here. When I moved out into my own place, I was shocked that problems could be solved without 2 hours of arguing, yelling, slamming sh*t and being dramatic."
~ Particular_Animal_98
Some of these traits are annoying, but mostly harmless. Others are fairly toxic.
What would you add to the list?