People Reveal Why They Really Had To Cut Ties With Their Best Friend

Whether we want to think about it or not, we all know that not every romantic relationship is meant to last forever.

But we often have an even harder time wrapping our minds around the fact that some friends come into our lives only for a season, no matter how strong the bond might feel at the time.

Redditor throwbackblue asked:

"Why did you end your friendship with your best friend?"

Reciprocity Is Important

"We always worked on his car together. I always worked on my car alone."

"It was a gradual realization for me. I am the house and car guy. My man is an accountant. I fix his car, he gives me all kinds of financial advice I can't get elsewhere (without paying). Two-way street."

"The best friend didn't have skills and knowledge. He learned about cars from me. Started a business flipping cars with what he learned from me."

"I learned to do two-man jobs alone from him not showing up. Eventually, I stopped asking for help."

"One day he called for me to help him and I decided I would rather stay where I was than go provide some one-way help."

"I always thought if I was an asset to people, they would be an asset to me when I was jammed up."

"I was about as wrong as when I said those battery-powered tools will never take off."

- 4benny2lavao0

A Friend To Everyone Else

"It was gradual for me over several years. I'd ask him to stop by, come hang out, cookouts at the house, and knock back some beers. He was always too busy eating out and being a friend to everyone else. He also actively chose to party and drop the rest of his friends to sell them. So..."

"I was too blind to realize that I never received the same effort back. Now I'm much more aware of the type of people who behave like this, but almost to a fault."

- B_o_x_u

"Yep, that happened to me, too. It took me a couple of years to realize this. I went through a really rough period in my life and I know my friends noticed that I was depressed, but none of them reached out or did anything for me."

"I tried to convince myself that they were busy with their own lives, but I watched them being a good friend to those who were going through a divorce or a job loss or a death in the family. And yes, I planned and did stuff for those people as well. I thought I'd get at least something back..."

- happyhappyfoolio2

Money Matters

"I ended the friendship after lending money. It’s true what they say about how money ruins relationships."

- Complex-Bobcat5391

"A decade-old friendship ended due to this… we are a group of eight who have been friends since about the seventh grade."

"This friend called each of us to ask for money because he said he couldn’t pay rent, so happened he was buying weed and not paying rent. It felt like betrayal especially since we are all struggling and some of us have kids. It felt rude."

- UnderlinedRed

Define "Emergency"

"Every problem she had was an emergency that I needed to drop everything for and give her my undivided immediate attention. But when I was having a rough time, the reply I got from her was 'stop your sh*t.'"

- oh_sheaintright

"Same here. I would drop everything to be there for her during any and everything, but she couldn’t show up to anything for me. She and her boyfriend would get into these insane fights and BOTH of them would call me and bring me right into the middle. They were insane."

"It got to the point when I would see either of their names pop up, I would just cry before answering. Safe to say my mental health is THRIVING now!"

- AssociateBusiness670

Finding A Real Friend

"I met some new people and I noticed that I liked hanging out with them more because they didn't make me feel like crap."

"I didn't really notice it at the time but looking back on it now, I realize that the guy I considered my best friend was actually my biggest bully. He was constantly insulting me, embarrassing me in front of other people, belittling me..."

"And I just thought that's what friends did. I had to make real friends to learn that's not the case."

- ImInJeopardy

An Apathetic Group

"My dad died. I asked if a few of my friends would hang out and have a low-key night playing video games. I told them I didn't want to have a big party."

"They said that was cool. I showed up and they'd invited a ton of people for a huge house party."

"Then they got p**sed that I was 'just sulking on the couch' and got s**tty with me. Our friendship never recovered and now we don't talk at all."

- Responsible-Onion860

"I’m so sorry to hear that, and I hope you have found better friends. I ended up breaking it off with a guy I was seeing for something similar."

"We had only gone on a few dates and he was telling me about one of his friends whose brother died just two months prior. Apparently, the entire friend group hung out recently, but that friend was being 'difficult' and 'cranky' and was just 'not fun to hang around.' The friend group then decided that they didn’t want to hang out with this friend anymore and told him so."

"I was appalled and speechless. It had only been about two months since his brother died, and this guy decided to just cut his 'friend' out of the group simply because he wasn’t as 'fun' while he was grieving his brother..."

"Needless to say, I didn’t go on any more dates with that guy."

- PennilessPirate

Always Calling And Texting First

"I didn't end it myself, but accepted it ended when I realized if I stopped talking, I'd never hear from him again."

- Starkscream

"It's a longing, stinging pain. It's one of those things where you don't realize just how much of you that you are pouring into a relationship, and it's just not reciprocated. Hurts when you finally examine it, but a weight off all at once."

- ARightDastard

Never Enough Time

"My former bestie canceled plans yet again, gave me a bulls**t excuse, and she said she was just really busy."

"I responded back with essentially, 'You’re always busy, how about you let me know when you have time for me,' and then literally never heard from her again."

"She posted something online that made it clear to me that her reason for canceling was bulls**t, and I realized that I was the only one who ever made an effort. I don’t know how it wasn’t obvious before; I guess I was in denial."

"The final straw was months later when she didn’t wish me a happy birthday, and I officially unfriended her."

- ReadySetTurtle

Nothing In Return

"We were friends for 20 years. She didn't drive so pretty much the entire friendship, I would take her grocery shopping every week. I took her cats to the vet. I helped her when she lost her house. For 20 years, I asked her for nothing."

"My husband ended up suddenly being diagnosed with brain cancer. The day he was released from the hospital after having a tumor the size of a lemon removed, I called in a prescription he needed, and our local pharmacy didn't have it, so I would have to drive an hour round trip."

"My husband wasn't able to handle that amount of time in the car, so I called to ask if she could stay with him while I got his meds. She told me no because she wanted to go to the store with her boyfriend. I called my neighbor and she watched him."

"I never talked to her again. It's been almost 10 years."

- softshoulder313

Unexplainable Ends

"In 2017, my best friend and I bought a house together. It was my grandmother's house, and she had just gone into a nursing home, so we got it on the cheap. The goal was to rehab it and eventually sell it."

"By 2021, it had become clear that it was more work than we were capable of. Plus, the house was small, just 920 square feet and a single story, so any buyer was just going to knock it down and build something bigger on the footprint anyway (which is just what happened), so it felt like we were doing a lot of work for nothing. In April of 2021, we sold it and made about $100k profit."

"And then my best friend since middle school, who had never given me any reason to doubt or mistrust him, and who had always been there for me through thick and thin (as I had been for him), disappeared with all the money."

"At first, I wasn't sure what was happening. I thought there must have been some kind of mistake or screw-up. Surely he couldn't have done what I thought. But eventually, he responded to a text message with, 'F**k you,' so I knew it was real. I just didn't know why."

"I sued him, but it didn't go well. Did you know that for an amount as small as $100k (really only $50k since I was only entitled to half) no lawyer will take your case on contingency? I sure didn't. It turns out that is much too small of an amount for them to bother with. And did you know that banks don't give personal loans for lawsuits? I didn't know that, either."

"So I had to pay for the lawsuit out of pocket. Unfortunately, my now ex-friend hired a lawyer who specializes in dragging cases out and running up the bills so that the other side runs out of money and gives up. I burned through all of my savings in a few months and then had to drop the case. That was in the Spring of 2022."

"Last month, on August 15th, my former friend passed away."

"I never ended the friendship at all; that was all on him. And to this day, I still don't really know why. I spoke to his ex-girlfriend, who hadn't seen him since December of 2021, and she thought he had a mental break, like a psychotic episode. But psychotic episodes don't usually last three years. And he was sane enough to hire a cutthroat attorney to defend his thievery. So I am left with a lot of questions and d**n few answers."

"Goodnight and good luck, old friend. May you find the peace that eluded you in life. Despite everything that happened, I never stopped thinking of you as a brother."

- Jorost

Off In Different Directions

"We grew apart. It sounds cliché, but life took us in different directions."

"I got married, moved to a different city, and had kids. He stayed in our hometown, stayed single, and we just stopped having common interests."

"The calls went from every day to once a week, then once a month, and then… nothing. Sometimes, that’s just how life goes."

- No-Extent-2396

Not Enough Of A Party Animal

"The second I got brain cancer, I stopped being included in their lives."

- healingalltheway

"You're worthy of being included. You're more than your illness."

- Limp-Television-1556

"This is absolutely horrible. I'm sorry this happened to you. I will never not be baffled at the way too common tendency people have to suddenly forget all about love and care when someone is no longer 'convenient.'"

"I will not claim to even remotely know how horrendous it must be to suffer brain cancer, but the way I lost my childhood best friend (a whole group of friends actually along with her) was over a similar sentiment of 'you're no longer fun.'"

"My former best friend and I had been friends since we were two or three years old. We grew up together, attached to the hip, went through high school together, the whole shebang. I considered her a sister, and along with her our whole group of girlfriends was really close."

"I got chronically sick at age 17, a difficult age for your entire life to turn upside down. I'm 36 now and still struggling immensely every day, and I've learned rather roughly who my real friends are."

"By the time we were all 18, there was pretty much an irreparable rift between me and my best friend/the other girls. Reason? I didn't go party enough anymore, I had said no to a drinking vacation in Spain, and I made 'no effort,' even though I had explained in a very vulnerable state multiple times to her (and the whole group) I simply could not physically keep up with nights of partying anymore."

"I thought these girls would be in my life forever. I got sick, and now I do not speak to them, nor have I spoken to them in nearly 20 years. I sometimes think I underestimate what a massive blow to my emotional health that has been; to this day I subconsciously believe anyone can drop me at any second."

"I'm so sorry for what your 'friend' did. You deserved support during the most difficult time in your life, and got the opposite. I hope you are surrounded by much better people today."

- Saharel

The Jealous Type

"A couple of months before my wedding, he told me he didn't want to be my best man anymore... via WhatsApp. The conversation that followed revealed that he was extremely jealous of the relationship my now wife and I have. We had been friends for 20 years."

- brotherfrank

"Same happened to me! Except it happened in a phone call right after the wedding. He was my best man and then ghosted me for two months. When I finally got him on a call, he was like, 'I don’t want to get in the way of anything, and I don’t want to talk to you again.' Nine years down the drain."

- lilmuffin4

Literally Losing Touch

"We grew apart as friends. Both of us had made other friends and moved on from each other."

"Neither of us stayed in touch with the other, though it also had more to do with moving to different cities and not knowing how to get in touch with each other. The internet didn't exist back then."

"My friend died in a car accident when he was 37, and I felt sad for his family for his loss and for everyone who had known him."

- Willing-Hour-3643

Justice For Dogs

"He surrendered his dog back to the shelter, after five years of owning him."

"His name was Dusty. He was a golden retriever, and he was the best boy ever. I would play fetch with him for hours until he would nearly pass out at my feet. Dusty was amazing! I loved him."

"One day, I go over to Dale's house, and I say, 'Where's Dusty?'"

"He answers, 'Oh, I gave him back to the shelter.'"

"Me: 'F**k! Why?!'"

"Dale: 'I only got him so that I could meet girls easier, and now that I'm married I don't need him anymore. Besides, having a dog is a lot of responsibility.'"

"Me: 'But you knew how I felt about him. WHY didn't you ask me? I would have gladly adopted him!'"

"Dale: 'You know, I never even thought of that.'"

"I left immediately and drove to the shelter. Dusty had already found a new home. So, I'm sad and glad in the same moment."

"F**k you, Dale. You're a d**k and I'm glad your wife finally divorced your selfish a**."

- PitBullFan

As painful as it can be for friendships to end, it's clear why most of these ended, and more importantly, it's a relief that each of these Redditors realized that they deserved better.

As much as they might have cared about their former friends, their former friends clearly did not value them in the same way, and at least now, each of these Redditors had an opportunity to meet kinder people.