When it comes to insults, clever is better.
Anyone can go the obvious route of simply calling out a person's physical appearance or intellectual capacity.
But if you really want to be remembered, you've got to be creative.
The playwright William Shakespeare was fond of clever insults.
And Ballroom culture made reading and shade into artforms.
Reddit user No_Throat_1574 asked:
"What is the most creative insult you’ve ever heard?"
Baked
"An employee of mine told me that I was the raisin in his day's chocolate chip cookie."
- SellingMakesNoSense
Not so artistic
"Your face looks like something I’d draw with my left hand."
- weshric
Talking out your butt
"'They ruined a perfectly good bum when they put teeth in your mouth.' - Billy Connolly."
- That80sguyspimp
"Growing up, my best friends mother used to say 'it’s a shame God put so many teeth in your mouth…ruined a perfectly good a**hole'…"
" Same energy. Shout out Tia 🖤"
- ends_and_odds
We all deserve a break
"You have your entire life to be an idiot. Why not take today off?"
- rip1980
Green with envy
"I envy people who don’t know you."
- StalinsPerfectHair
Right in the childhood
"'You're not being the person Mr. Rogers knew you could be.' Emotional damage"
- couch_hammer
Emotional Damage GIF by Jennifer AccomandoGiphySlow down a bit
"Knowledge has been chasing you, but you have always been faster."
- Bright-Baker8267
Common loot energy
"You look like you drop common loot when defeated."
- GeorgeCauldron7
A bit bland
"I’ve always enjoyed 'If she were a spice, she’d be flour.'"
- Toren8002
No excuses
"I bumped into a homeless guy. I said excuse me."
"He said 'There is no excuse for you!!!'"
"With his leathered vigor, he's probably right."
- LOGOisEGO
Pain in the foot
"One time a third grader who was very annoyed with me told me 'you’re a rock in my shoe' and I’ve never forgotten that"
- madagascarprincess
Reap what you sow
"I hope your day is as lovely as your personality."
- montanagrizfan
"This works as both an insult and a compliment"
- Yezzzzzzzzzzzz
"'If my dog had a face like yours, I’d shave it’s @ss and teach it to walk backwards'"
- WteMxy
boxer dog gifofdogs GIF by Rover.comGiphyI would consult my own
"'If I wanted to hear an a**hole’s opinion, I would have just farted.' Learned this one a month ago and don’t know how I survived 40.5 years without it!!"
- ITSBRITNEYsBrITCHES
I'm not that flexible
"I'm trying to see things from your point of view but my head won't fit up my arse."
- Horrorbmoviepunk
It's generally better to try to play nice with others when you can but, if you're going to be mean, at least get creative.
