Many people will maintain that "love at first sight" is, indeed, very real, and that sometimes you know you've met your one true love from the very moment you've met them.
Until you find yourself waiting for your boyfriend to propose and become your fiancée, believing every dinner out or special occasion is going to be that moment.
Only to find yourself heartbroken to discover that "that moment" will never come, instead stumbling upon another, less anticipated "moment".
When you realize you haven't met the one you were going to marry after all.
Redditor Itsemmaxx was curious to hear people's stories of the exact moment they realized that they incorrectly predicted meeting their future spouse, leading them to ask:
"What moment made you realize your gf/bf would never be your wife/husband?"
It's Never Too Soon To Start Thinking In The Long Term
"When we finally got into deep talks about how we viewed our futures I realized our goals didn’t align."- Curious-Air4196
An Unwise Investment
"She lied badly about money and how much debt she was in."
"Her best friend showed me a text she had sent basically saying all I need is to get him to marry me and he’ll be stuck with my debts too."- CelticB-stard
Some Things Just Aren't A Laughing Matter
"He couldn’t handle any serious conversation."
"Every time I brought up the future, he’d just joke around or change the subject."
"It made me realize he wasn’t in it for the long haul."- Perfect_ladybabe122
big brother pop GIF by Big Brother After DarkGiphy
Finding Middle Ground Is Paramount
"When we were looking for places to rent/buy for a home and she absolutely refused to compromise on where we'd be living."
"It's a long story, but her reasoning in that moment told me all I really needed to know about where I was placed as importance in her mind."- Cyanora
No Relationship Can Survive Without Trust
"When she asked her friend to flirt with me to test me."- Nelson4ay59
No Explanation Needed
"I was planning on proposing to my long term girlfriend, but then she got into a serious accident where she fell and landed onto a friends' d*ck."
"Dodged a bullet there."
"This was many moons ago....and jokes on her."
"I'm very happily married now with kids."- Ben716
Priorities
"I was stuck in bed healing from a serious accident."
"I had several pelvic fractures and spinal fractures plus serious emotional trauma."
"My mom had come to stay with me to help take care of me."
"My ex came to visit one day like two weeks after the accident and he was pouting because I wouldn’t have sex with him."
"Then he made a joke to my mother about how 'well endowed' he was."
"hahahahahahahahahahaha."- UCantSeeMyWhale
You Can't Choose Your In-Laws
"When I met her dad."
"I couldn't stand the man and I knew I couldn't put up with him for the rest of one of our lives."
"I tried extremely hard to stay with her but anytime we went to a family event or holiday it made me die a little inside."
"When we talked about our future she always said she wanted to live close to him."
"The thought of him being a grandfather to any possible kids we would have had sealed the deal, and I had to call it off."
"We were together for 3 years, met during first year of college, and I met her dad about six months into the relationship for the first time at Christmas."- MoldyOldCrow
Quid Pro Quo
"I don't want to trauma-dump, so I'll leave it at this: pay attention to how they treat you when you are physically unwell and reliant on them."- KittyCamino
Thank You Dad
"He tried to control everything I did."
"He told me I couldn't go over to my friend's house after school because 'he didn't trust them', I couldn't babysit anymore because 'I need to be inside my house by 6 pm every night', I couldn't wear pink, red, or purple anymore and I could only wear long pants and turtleneck shirts as 'I need to dress modestly'."
"Not only did I NOT obey him, but even he came to my house before school, he told me, in front of my dad, that I had to change my clothes."
"I was sent out of the room, and 23 years later, I'm still not sure what my dad said to him, but all his crazy demands stopped, and I broke up with him a few weeks later."- SassyCatLady442
Tv Show Love GIF by CW Kung FuGiphy
Well, Neither Are They..
"During a weekend trip that I had practically fully funded, I realized that I did not have my card when fueling."
"When I asked her to pay, she said what am I, a bank?"- Suspicious-Clerk8542
What A Guy...
"He wanted a SAH wife, but without protection in case we split."
"I will not lose my financial independence for anyone."
"Too many horror stories."
"He married, and his wife got screwed years later."- Mukduk_30
What's Yours Is Yours And What's Mine Is... Mine...
"She talked about everything like it was hers."
"Her tv."
"Her apartment."
"Her couch."
"Her cats."
"Never ours when speaking to anyone, even me."- AlarminglyConfused
Sasheer Zamata Snl GIF by Saturday Night LiveGiphy
Taking "Grateful Dead" A Bit Too Literally
"She called me at work to inform me that my favorite musician died and laughed in my face about it."
"I'm an old - Jerry Garcia."- billstrash
Not All Chases Are Worth Keeping Up With
"My ex always had a subtle way of making me feel like I was never enough."
"I was always chasing his affection, which was never guaranteed."
"Eventually I remember realizing that a lifetime of that excruciating chase would be hell."
"That in fact, he doesn’t actually love me—he loves an idea of me."- melted-turquoise
There comes a point where many people are determined that their next partner will be their last.
However, love cannot be forced, and it is better to admit defeat than fight a losing battle.
After all, should love ever feel like a "battle" to begin with?
