We've all heard someone ask a mother who is out of the house, "Who is babysitting your children?" If she happens to say that their father is home with them, she might get the reaction, "Oh, it's so nice that he's babysitting for you."
While it seems like a simple word choice, there are a lot of issues happening here. First of all, a father cannot babysit his own children; they are his children, and it is his responsibility to be a part of the parenting process. Second of all, there's no such thing as a father babysitting "for his wife."
This is just like a man saying that he is willing to "help" his wife with chores around the house if she only would tell him what she needed him to do. It's not a temporary job with a small paycheck at the end. It's a lifetime commitment, complete with providing and teaching a child everything they need to grow into a well-adjusted adult.
While many people don't see the issue here, TikToker @julieandcorey clearly got the memo.
A TikTok trend has been going around lately where mothers are supposed to ask their husbands if they "will babysit their kids" to gauge what their husbands' reaction are. Reactions have ranged from confused to sure, no problem, but many have missed the key part of the phrase: "babysitting" instead of "watching" or "parenting."
When Julie of the @julieandcorey TikTok account asked her husband Corey this, he was quick on his feet with an answer.
"Why are you saying 'babysitting'? I’ll watch her. I’ll watch our child."
"What are you talking about? You don’t call it ‘babysitting’ your kid."
"Spend quality time, have a daddy-daughter day, sure."
When Julie said she'd be gone for a few hours to get her nails done, Corey stated:
"OK, so go get your nails done."
When Julie tried to confirm if he could babysit, Corey stood firm.
"No, I cannot babysit. I'll be spending my Friday night with our daughter."
You can watch the video here:
Some thought the whole interaction was so wholesome and, simply, priceless.
@julieandcorey/TikTok
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Others agreed and were especially tickled by his interpretation of "sitting on babies."
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Some also loved how he confirmed in the beginning who was being babysat.
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But most applauded the father's statement that this qualified as parenting, not babysitting.
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As much as it might seem like no big deal to blur the lines between parenting and babysitting, there's a distinct difference between the two, and the expectations for each are wildly different.
A dad is not expected to simply watch his child enough to make sure they don't get into something they shouldn't, and that they are not hungry.
A dad should meaningfully contribute to their growing, learning, and living of their human experience, even if they're only flying solo for an afternoon.
Good on this dad for recognizing that.
@jaketapoer/Bluesky
@BillAckman/Twitter