Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

Men Speculate Where They Absolutely Would NOT Take Their Penis If It Were Detachable

A penis is a very sensitive organ, okay? Men hold them dear for a reason. (See what I did there?)

Now imagine if men could remove a penis whenever they needed to. It'd be so convenient. No more random erections in uncomfortable places. No need to be concerned the next time you're playing with knives in the kitchen. You'd just go through life serving Ken Doll realness, and it'd be so practical and useful.


Men shared their thoughts with us after Redditor simbabeat asked the online community:

"Men, if your penis was easily detachable, what is a place or an event where you would definitely not take it with you?"

"Honestly I'd probably just leave it in my nightstand like all the time, as long as I could still pee without it."

Persies

Okay, fair. A practical man. Just make sure it stays in the nightstand!

"No need..."

"Work, honestly. No need for it there."

Damn_Wright

Judging by the stories I've heard about some workplaces... not so sure about "no need."

"Is it hard..."

"Is it erect when detached? Can I sing into it like a hair brush?"

TheMOESIAH

Ummm... perhaps?

What would you be singing?

Do we really want to know?

"Martial arts..."

"Martial arts for sure."

[deleted]

Now this is definitely an environment I wouldn't want my own penis in. Good call.

"I'd be..."

"I'd be open-carrying everywhere."

balticromancemyass

That's a lot of confidence you have, sir.

"No chance..."

"Any business meeting. No chance of an unexpected boner."

[deleted]

This works out quite well, especially if you have to stand and give presentations.

"As a grower..."

"The gym. As a grower, that is really embarrassing during certain exercises."

mostlyBADchoices

It would be much better to leave it in the locker before you go and work out, I think.

A sleepover..."

"A sleepover with friends. We'd probably just end up swapping them around or playing "hot potato" with them."

thatrockguy7

What a day to be able to read.

"I lose anything..."

"It would never leave my bedroom. I lose anything that's not attached."

Aran909

Ah, a man who knows themselves well.

"I'd treat it..."

"I’d treat it like my car when going out for drinks and just leave it at home. Don’t have to worry about losing it, or wrecking it. Or using it while intoxicated."

[deleted]

So responsible! Good for you!

Turns out men are a lot more practical with their penises off than on. Who knew?

Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!

Want to "know" more?

Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Screenshots from @ms_d_math's TikTok video
@ms_d_math/TikTok

Teachers Share The Things That Were Normal For Millennials That Would Have Their Students 'Crashing Out'

We all know, in theory, that the times are changing, and with each new generation of students there will be changes in educational curriculum, approach, and learning tools.

But just like how hard it can be to do the math to figure out how long ago we graduated from high school, it can be really hard to swallow the fact that school looks so incredibly different for students now than it did for Millennials and Gen-Xers.

Keep ReadingShow less
Mehmet Oz
Celal Gunes/Anadolu via Getty Images

Dr. Oz Raises Eyebrows Over His Bizarre Defense Of New Guidelines For Alcohol Consumption

Dr. Mehmet Oz, President Donald Trump's administrator for the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS), raised eyebrows over his bizarre and surprisingly permissive defense of new guidelines for alcohol consumption, saying "it does allow people an excuse to bond and socialize, and there’s probably nothing healthier than having a good time with friends in a safe way."

Oz spoke as the Trump administration on Wednesday released updated dietary guidelines for Americans, emphasizing whole and minimally processed foods, reduced consumption of refined carbohydrates, and what officials described as a “war” on added sugars.

Keep ReadingShow less
Bowen Yang
Bruce Glikas/FilmMagic/Getty Images

Bowen Yang Gets Candid About Why He Decided To Leave 'SNL' After His Sudden Exit

Bowen Yang, who's well-known for his work on Saturday Night Live and his role in Wicked and Wicked: For Good, stepped off of the SNL stage for the last time, mid-season, after being a writer and performer for the past eight seasons.

During his final skit, Yang starred opposite Ariana Grande, with the couple playing a married couple. Grande was waiting for Bowen to come from after his final shift before retiring from working at an airport.

Keep ReadingShow less
Kyle Rittenhouse
Sean Krajacic-Pool/Getty Images

Kyle Rittenhouse Blasted Over Sociopathic Post Following ICE Shooting In Minneapolis

Kenosha shooter Kyle Rittenhouse sparked outrage after he offered to travel to Minnesota following ICE's fatal shooting of Renee Nicole Good, a mother of three, in Minneapolis on Wednesday.

Department of Homeland Security (DHS) spokesperson Tricia McLaughlin claimed Good “weaponized her vehicle, attempting to run over our law enforcement officers in an attempt to kill them.” But Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey pushed back against this narrative considering witnesses described seeing Good in the vehicle trying to flee officers when she was shot.

Keep ReadingShow less
LEGO's 'SMART Brick'
Patrick T. Fallon/AFP/Getty Images

Lego Just Unveiled Their New Tech-Heavy 'Smart Brick'—But Not Everyone Is Excited About It

LEGO has long been known for its fostering of creativity, independent play, and imaginative designs, both in their LEGO sets and free-form bricks.

Parents have long hailed LEGO as a viable option for fostering creativity and critical thinking, even when faced with the frustrations of children not cleaning up all of the pieces and the pains of potentially stepping on them.

Keep ReadingShow less