Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

Men Speculate Where They Absolutely Would NOT Take Their Penis If It Were Detachable

Make us preferred on Google

A penis is a very sensitive organ, okay? Men hold them dear for a reason. (See what I did there?)

Now imagine if men could remove a penis whenever they needed to. It'd be so convenient. No more random erections in uncomfortable places. No need to be concerned the next time you're playing with knives in the kitchen. You'd just go through life serving Ken Doll realness, and it'd be so practical and useful.


Men shared their thoughts with us after Redditor simbabeat asked the online community:

"Men, if your penis was easily detachable, what is a place or an event where you would definitely not take it with you?"

"Honestly I'd probably just leave it in my nightstand like all the time, as long as I could still pee without it."

Persies

Okay, fair. A practical man. Just make sure it stays in the nightstand!

"No need..."

"Work, honestly. No need for it there."

Damn_Wright

Judging by the stories I've heard about some workplaces... not so sure about "no need."

"Is it hard..."

"Is it erect when detached? Can I sing into it like a hair brush?"

TheMOESIAH

Ummm... perhaps?

What would you be singing?

Do we really want to know?

"Martial arts..."

"Martial arts for sure."

[deleted]

Now this is definitely an environment I wouldn't want my own penis in. Good call.

"I'd be..."

"I'd be open-carrying everywhere."

balticromancemyass

That's a lot of confidence you have, sir.

"No chance..."

"Any business meeting. No chance of an unexpected boner."

[deleted]

This works out quite well, especially if you have to stand and give presentations.

"As a grower..."

"The gym. As a grower, that is really embarrassing during certain exercises."

mostlyBADchoices

It would be much better to leave it in the locker before you go and work out, I think.

A sleepover..."

"A sleepover with friends. We'd probably just end up swapping them around or playing "hot potato" with them."

thatrockguy7

What a day to be able to read.

"I lose anything..."

"It would never leave my bedroom. I lose anything that's not attached."

Aran909

Ah, a man who knows themselves well.

"I'd treat it..."

"I’d treat it like my car when going out for drinks and just leave it at home. Don’t have to worry about losing it, or wrecking it. Or using it while intoxicated."

[deleted]

So responsible! Good for you!

Turns out men are a lot more practical with their penises off than on. Who knew?

Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!

Want to "know" more?

Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Donald Trump
Andrew Harnik/Getty Images

New Photos Of Trump On Air Force One Seemingly Reveal His Alarming Plans For The Kennedy Center

Viral photos of President Donald Trump have sparked alarm after they were captured by a Getty photographer, showing President Donald Trump looking at what appeared to be a posterboard presentation about the future of the Kennedy Center.

Only a small portion of the poster board could be seen, but the legible text suggested a connection to the Kennedy Center and included the word “DEMOLISH." The images were captured by Getty Images photographer Brendan Smialowski.

Keep ReadingShow less
Hannah Revels
@hannahhrevels/TikTok

Woman Recounts 'Craziest' Experience At Restaurant While Reality TV Show Was Filming There—And Yikes

There's a saying about being a "jack of all trades" that's popular for a reason: basically, you cannot be the best at everything, and if you try to be the master of juggling too many plates, you're likely to drop some of them.

TikToker Hannah Revels went out for a double date, including her husband and a couple of friends, to a restaurant that she did not disclose. It's supposed to be a nicer restaurant that was recently renovated, and it's also located in Charleston, South Carolina, so celebrity sightings are fairly common.

Keep ReadingShow less
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez; Mike Johnson; Zohran Mamdani

Mike Johnson Called Out For His Blatant Hypocrisy After Accusing Mamdani And AOC Of 'Laughing' At 9/11 Victims

During a press conference on Tuesday, Republican Speaker of the House Mike Johnson regurgitated a previously disproven claim that New York progressive Democratic Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and New York City Democratic Socialist Mayor Zohran Mamdani were laughing while the names of victims of the 9/11 terrorist attacks were read during the 25th anniversary commemoration in NYC.

The story first made the rounds of MAGA influencers on the day of the memorial ceremonies.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots from @phlynnmartin's TikTok
@phlynnmartin/TikTok

Guy Sparks Debate After Calling Out 'Nightmare' Date Who Racked Up $330 Bill At Frozen Yogurt Shop In Viral TikTok

TikToker Phlynn Martin may not be crying over spilled milk, but he might be ready to cry over money spent on frozen yogurt.

After going on a first date with "a friend," Martin sat in his car and shared the story of going to the popular Melbourne-based frozen yogurt chain, Yo Chi. He looked increasingly shocked and perplexed over what he clearly perceived as offense after offense to proper dating etiquette.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots from @sailors.mama's TikTok
@sailors.mama/TikTok

TikToker Shares The Outfits She Wore To School Her Senior Year To Hide Her Teen Pregnancy—And Viewers Are Stunned

Most people would agree that high school is tough, from going through puberty and figuring out who you are, to trying to decide what to do for a career and where you might like to go for trade school or college, and maybe experiencing your first love.

Also, going through teen pregnancy during that time takes the high school experience to a whole other level.

Keep ReadingShow less