A man recently found himself confronting his high school bully and it did not end well. But who's in the wrong?
Can you say, high school drama?
The confrontation in question happened at the mall. Because of course it did.
While telling the whole story in a Reddit post, the formerly bullied man notes that the confrontation happened in a mall out of town from where he and his bully grew up.
Known on Reddit as u/Throwawaybulliedboy, the now-grown victim walks us through the scene.
"I (27M) was bullied really badly by this one girl (27F) for many years, right up until I left high school. I've since moved on and forgot about many of those things."
After some typical post-high school awkwardness, the bully wants redemption.
"I awkwardly say hi, and she asks me the usual chit chat. Well after a few minutes the ice has broken, and she gives me a full apology. She says how she is sorry and she regrets it etc."
"Then she says 'so we're cool now? Do you forgive me?'"
The man, however, is not so ready to forgive and forget.
"I just say 'That's nice...but personally I don't forgive you.'"
It's at this point that the bully cannot handle not having her ego massaged.
So she goes off, as wild as ever.
"That's when she loses it. She calls me a 'f***ing a**hole' and says 'You really couldn't just forgive me? I've been wanting to say this for years. F***ing a**hole.'"
The Redditor gets the last word, though, and does not back down.
"I just say to her 'If you really think that negatively on me, you clearly don't care about me. You were just apologizing to make yourself feel better,' then I walked off."
He took to Reddit to ask if he did the right thing or if HE was the a--hole in this scenario.
The sentiment of Redditors was largely on this guy's side.
"You can owe an apology, but you never owe forgiveness." –u/cheesymm
"Based on her reaction, I think you are correct that she was apologizing to absolve herself not to to actually make amends. You aren't obligated to forgive her, especially if the apology is insincere." –u/SelfawareAimBot
"An apology without change is just manipulation. Sounds like she's still a bully." –u/HellaHighAtHogwarts
She she should have said "I hope someday you forgive me, I'm sorry for the hurt I caused because I was hurting." She could have been so nice about it. Instead she went off and started swearing at you... proving she's the asshole in this situation. Some bullies never grow up. - BabyGotBantz
Nta.. you don't have to forgive someone in a situation like this. She blind sided you with an apology and became a bully as soon as you rejected it. It clearly wasn't sincere. - 1stonebridge
All things considered, the interaction could have gone far worse.
In June of 2019, for example, a 13-year-old boy put a grown woman in the hospital after she claimed the boy was bullying her son.
Glad to hear things didn't come to blows in the mall.