Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

Adults Share The Most Depressing Way To Describe Their Jobs, And We're Dying

Adults Share The Most Depressing Way To Describe Their Jobs, And We're Dying
www.maxpixel.net

Miserable at work? You're not alone, so let's laugh at it. Think of the most depressing aspect of your work. Someone has it worse, and now you can feel better about yourself. You're welcome.

NecessaryZombie asked working misers of Reddit: What's the most depressing way you can describe your job?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.


The woe of payroll, perhaps.

Giphy

I constantly stare at the screen making sure people get paid more than me.

1300-71992-488

I'm so sorry.

I'm a web developer.

trashpandalov3r

Life insurance FTW.

Giphy

I reward people with money when their loved ones die.

Ronald__Dump

Gotta learn somehow.

I force students to use their non-existent English skills by pretending I don't speak their native language.

stereovictrola

That's what Reddit is for.

It's 8:17 and I'm already done with actual work but have to sit here until 5 anyway.

daandilion

Those poor, poor IT specialists. Oy vey.

Giphy

If you took a second to google the problem, I'd lose 75% of my workload.

Red-pop

Literally programming yourself into obscurity.

The company doesn't want to pay people to mindlessly press buttons all day so I write scripts that mindlessly press buttons for me, then watch as the computer accomplishes in five minutes what would take me an entire day to get done.

Then every once in a while they tell me to make the computer mindlessly press some buttons but I can't, so I have to spend the rest of my day pretending I'm the computer.

theonlydidymus

Someone has to keep people like me away.

I go to a construction site all night and sit and watch a fence till the sun comes up.

RyMillions

Too much?

Giphy

Occasionally I sit in a chair and get called the devil by little old ladies who believe they're in hell. More often I'm a professional a** wiper.

kim-jong-the-illest-

Any guesses?

I use very subjective and limited information to determine if people are lying to me, and my performance is based solely on whether or not my coworkers agree with my decision.

mr_heathcliffe

Delivery driver of some sort?

I deliver poisonous food to lazy people who are often overweight and otherwise sick from eating the wrong thing. I drive in some of the most dangerous traffic in America (Dallas, TX). My first year on the job some teenagers plowed into the front wheel of my car while I had the right-of-way in a parking lot, a few days before Christmas. A few weeks ago a big orange traffic barrel rolled right out in front of me and I was forced to swerve into an under-construction entrance ramp in order to avoid being in a huge accident.

Killashandra19

People who work in retail have stomachs made of stone.

Giphy

I'm at the mercy of suits and plebs at least 50, mostly closer to 60 hours a week. I'm a retail manager. The suits are always pressuring for better efficiency and goal hitting while the plebs are pissed eggs went up 10 cents and want to return an item they bought 7 years ago but don't have their receipt.

girlbboss

An editor, perhaps?

I have to check the work of people much smarter than I am to make sure they don't make stupid, stupid mistakes.

If I miss one of the stupid mistakes, I'm the one who gets in trouble, not the smart person who made the stupid mistake in the first place.

shaidyn

This is deep, for a signmaker.

I arrange shapes and colors in an attempt to communicate a message, but also to make it pleasing and/or intrusive to the viewer, depending on the context. Sometimes this kills the soul piece by piece, other times it makes me feel powerful because people like me have already gotten to you and messed with your brain in ways some of you possibly can't comprehend, whether you'd like to admit it or not.

Horrible side effects working with it include, but are not limited to: never being able to look at packaging/signs/menus/posters etc the same way as before, and becoming somewhat of an arrogant dick that people don't much care for, for reasons they might not even get themselves. But then I have to remind them that it's because of people like me that they might get out of a building on fire safely, and/or get out of accidents etc with their lives and limbs intact too.

MacheteDont

We have a winner.

Giphy

Hotel housekeeping. If it comes out of the human body, I've cleaned it up. I started in a by-the-hour motel when I was 14, owned by a woman who didn't bother with hazardous waste procedure and cleaned up what looked like a murder scene with nothing but bleach and kitchen gloves. I walked into that room, and was absolutely positive that when I pulled the shower curtain open there was going to be a body in the bathtub. Thankfully there wasn't, just blood everywhere. Owner refused to let me report it, made me clean it, and I didn't want to get in shit for bleaching a murder scene at 14 so I never did call the cops.

chalkyard

More from Trending

Jesse Watters
Fox News

Jesse Watters Dragged After Adding Another Mind-Boggling Rule For 'Real Men'

Fox News host Jesse Watters, who is apparently an authority of what it means to be a manly man, gave jazz hands to make a point about how "real men" should or shouldn't wave.

The target of his ridicule was Tim Walz, the enthusiastic Democratic Minnesota governor and vice presidential candidate who often greets the public by raising both hands in the air to wave.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots of crowd at town hall and Rep. Mike Flood
@MorePerfectUS/X; KETV NewsWatch 7

GOP Rep. Goes Viral For His Response To Crowd Chanting 'Tax The Rich' At Town Hall

Nebraska Republican Representative Mike Flood was criticized following his incredulous response to a crowd that chanted "Tax the rich!" during a town hall meeting.

The Columbus High School auditorium hosted the town hall on Tuesday evening, drawing "nearly 380" attendees, according to local network KETV Omaha. The event was lively, with Flood facing both sharp criticism over Trump administration policies and some appreciation for showing up in person.

Keep ReadingShow less
Elon Musk
Andrew Harnik/Getty Images

Awkward Typo In Elon Musk's Bizarre 'Education Department' Trump Meme Is A Total Self-Own

Billionaire Elon Musk was widely mocked after he celebrated President Donald Trump's executive order to begin to dismantle the Department of Education (DOE) by posting a meme of Trump at the department's grave, only for an awkward misspelling to get all the attention.

Polling indicates that eliminating the Education Department is largely unpopular, with 60% of registered voters opposing the move, according to a Quinnipiac University survey conducted March 6-10. Support stands at 33%, with opposition particularly strong among Democrats—98% oppose it, while just 1% support it.

Keep ReadingShow less
JB Pritzker; Donald Trump
Jacek Boczarski/Anadolu via Getty Images; Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images

Dem Governor Reveals Trump's Bonkers Demand In Exchange For Equipment During COVID

Illinois Democratic Governor J.B. Pritzker revealed during a speech this week that he clashed with President Donald Trump during the first Trump administration after Trump promised necessary medical equipment during the COVID pandemic on the condition that Pritzker praise him publicly.

Five years ago, the United States was grappling with the initial impacts of the COVID-19 pandemic. The country had entered shutdowns that had severe economic consequences, leaving businesses and industries on the brink of collapse.

Keep ReadingShow less
Scrabble tiles spelling the word scam
Scam spelled with scrabbles on a wooden table

People Break Down How They Realized An Entire Industry Was A Total Scam

We unfortunately live in a world where scams are on the rise.

Thankfully, some of them are pretty easy to detect, such as an automated call from the IRS telling you a warrant is out for your arrest, or an email claiming to be from Amazon or the USPS asking for your credit card information, only to look closer and see the email address is a yahoo account.

Keep ReadingShow less