Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

Guy Mortified After Realizing He Just Hooked Up With A Woman Whose Daughter He Had Recently Slept With

Guy Mortified After Realizing He Just Hooked Up With A Woman Whose Daughter He Had Recently Slept With
Roy Hsu via Getty Images
Make us preferred on Google

Quietly leaving after a purely physical sexual encounter is guilt-ridden enough when it occurs in the vacuum of one's own emotions, on display for nobody.

It becomes exponentially worse when the act of leaving involves immediately confronting the fallout of another purely physical sexual encounter.

And both partners are related.


The "walk of shame" is a cultural institution. The libido-fueled cloud of desire from the prior evening faded sometime in the night while both parties slept.

In the morning after no strings attached, transactional sex, there is one goal on a person's mind: remain invisible, get home without interacting with anybody and reflect in the shower.

For one Redditor, some brutal eye contact and a behind-the-scenes look at a family tree were two additional, unwelcome variables to that escape-minded journey. On the popular

subReddit "Today I F'd Up,"

BlewOffMyLegOff—as the master of ungraceful exit is known on Reddit—begins his hook-up story by establishing the setting: a place where transactional sex abounds.

"So for a little bit of context, I live near a rather large college campus, tons of girls go to local bars nearby and I hooked up with this girl one night 6 months ago. One and done deal, no hurt feelings about it."

The foreshadowing here is clear.

He continues on to the sexual encounter at hand, no doubt sparked by a dating app.

"Fast forward to a week ago, I match with an older woman, she's in her 40s and I'm in my mid 20s, we exchange messages and arrange to meet for drinks on Friday. We meet, things go very well, she asks me back to her place, I agree stupidly."

"Stupidly," used here, is likely the product of hindsight.

Based on the tale thus far, this man does not appear to be prudish at such a moment in the date.

"When we get back to her place, i think to myself that this place looked familiar, but ignored that and proceeded with the hook up."

"Follow your gut" has never felt like such good advice.

BlewOffMyLegOff had the solution in his grasp; he smelled that things were awry.

But he pressed on toward hedonism and the inevitable come down (which would strangely involve eggs, as the reader will learn).

"She asked me to spend the night, I agreed stupidly, and when I woke up the next morning to leave I smelled breakfast cooking. To my absolute shock and dismay her daughter locked eye contact with me."
"It's the girl from 6 months ago. I was able to fumble together an excuse to leave and noped out."
"Single most awkward experience of my life."

Needless to say, the Reddit community was way more positive about the whole thing, tossing around jokes and questions.

After all, it's far easier to derive enjoyment when you're not the one locked into eye contact with an old flame, a phoenix rising from the ashes and you just had sex with mama bird.

First, there were outlandish suggestions.

"Should've asserted dominance and introduced yourself as her new daddy." -- WeakPressure1
"Hard mode: Now you have to bang the dad." -- KriegerBahn
"I want an update when you match with grandma." -- _OneTwo_
"You are still young enough that you got a chance with a granddaughter when she turns 21." -- robbdavenport
"When you woke up and smelled breakfast cooking, that was the beginning of Act II." -- enormusschwanzstucker
"Dude you were about to get free home cooked breakfast after a hookup. Your only f*ck up here was leaving." -- skraz1265
"I've watched and researched this a lot! you should of stayed for hot threesome sex." -- dirtyundies12

Some got over their laughter and swooped in with some logic and reasoning.

Nerds.

"If the mom is having college aged guys near campus spend the night knowing her daughter will run into them, chances are they don't really care about sharing hookups." -- CMDR_KingErvin
"If he got them both pregnant how would the kids be all related." -- sailorjasm

It is unclear where the narrator of this story ultimately ate breakfast. Maybe there's a story there too.

More from Trending

Ellie Goulding attends the V&A Summer Party 10th Anniversary at V&A South Kensington.
Dave Benett/Getty Images for V&A

Ellie Goulding Perfectly Shuts Down One Of Her Own Fans Who Made A Transphobic Comment About Her Outfits

There are plenty of ways to compliment Ellie Goulding’s wardrobe. Dragging trans people into it for absolutely no reason probably isn’t one of them.

Over the weekend, one fan learned that lesson after praising the British singer-songwriter’s recent “feminine” looks before taking an anti-trans detour that Goulding quickly shut down.

Keep ReadingShow less
Jonathan Lipnicki; Robert Pattinson in 'Primetime'
Frank Trapper/Corbis via Getty Images; A24

Fans Are Stunned After Realizing Former Child Star Jonathan Lipnicki Has A Wild Cameo In 'Primetime'

Primetime just released, and viewers are buzzing online about the film's many surprise twists and turns, and as it turns out, reveals.

The psychological crime thriller throws viewers back to the early 2000s reality television series To Catch a Predator, and follows NBC journalist Chris Hansen, played by Robert Pattinson, as he stages situations that are ultimately meant to catch pedophiles and other criminals.

Keep ReadingShow less
Florence Pugh; sign for Cornell University; Josh Gad
Jason Mendez/Getty Images for Netflix; Matt Burkhartt/Getty Images; Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images for Disney

Florence Pugh And Josh Gad Lead Celebrity Outrage After Cornell Frat Members Assigned Essays As Punishment For Sexual Assault

About a week ago, the story of the "Cornell 7" allegations broke publicly when a civil lawsuit was filed by a former Cornell University student known only as Jane Doe. The lawsuit detailed an October 2024 sexual assault at the Chi Phi fraternity house and Cornell University's handling of the assault after it was reported to school officials.

The public backlash against the seven rapists and four university officials named in the suit, as well as Cornell University, the Ivy League, and fraternities as a whole has been swift. Many people have shared their own experiences with institutions of higher learning and the mishandling of sexual assaults.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshot of Luanne James
WKRN News 2/YouTube

Heroic Tennessee Librarian Sues After Being Fired For Refusing To Hide LGBTQ+ Books From Kids

Luanne James, the former library director of Tennessee's Rutherford County, has filed a lawsuit against the county's library board after she was terminated for refusing to move LGBTQ+ books from the children's section to the adult section.

The board’s decision to move the roughly 100 children’s books to the adult section followed a statewide “age-appropriateness review” ordered the previous year by Tennessee Secretary of State Tre Hargett, a Republican.

Keep ReadingShow less
Donald Trump
Aaron Schwartz/Getty Images

Trump Hit With Blistering Factcheck After Making Patently False Claim About Prices Going 'Way Down'

President Donald Trump was swiftly fact-checked by CNN fact-checker Daniel Dale after he claimed to members of the press that "almost every price has come way down" following Joe Biden's presidency.

Earlier in the day, Trump bragged to reporters that the United States has the "best poverty," sparking immediate criticism. He continued to lie later, even as inflation remains above the level recorded when Biden left office, economic growth has slowed, and the cost of filling a gas tank has surged roughly 50% since the war against Iran began.

Keep ReadingShow less